


Subject Beta

by Squiglemouse



Category: Devilman (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Accidental Bondage, Alternate Universe, Ambiguous/Open Ending, Blindfolds, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, M/M, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-12
Updated: 2018-08-01
Packaged: 2019-04-21 19:39:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 24
Words: 23,885
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14291988
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Squiglemouse/pseuds/Squiglemouse
Summary: Ryo Asuka was a scientist, and now part of his duty was monitoring subject Beta and Gamma.





	1. Beta & Gamma

**Author's Note:**

> Obviously an AU.

**Subject Beta**

**Observation record**

**Date 04/11/2xx3**

 

The subject in question is from the phase three trials. Only two subjects remain from that batch. Subject Beta and Subject Gamma. Their naming order was determined by their inception date. Both of these two are considered failures for a variety of reasons. I hold hope that something useful can be made out of them. This is the first day I have begun observing them, though this record will focus on Beta. Some of the old researchers in defiance of policy dubbed him Akira. Old records indicate he is a crybaby. So far I have seen him cry five times in the last hour. I consider the crybaby title to be well earned. Still there's something about Beta that is oddly endearing. On the subject of Beta I suppose there's no choice but to discuss the other since they share a fancy, if antiquated enclosure.

 

Subject Gamma is from the same originating experiment, apparently there used to be a Gamma-two. Another female which spent large amounts of times in contact with Gamma-one. Apparently from what I have found in old logs they were both nicknamed Miki originally. At some point the logs for Gamma-one change to Miko. It seems they had something of an intimate connection. I was rather concerned that the subjects had the potential for a viable pregnancy and all the interference that could make. I've since come to the conclusion that while Beta and Gamma do seem to be friendly to each other. That there is zero risk. Since despite displaying what appears to be voracious sexual appetites they have made no attempts to mate.

 

Weirdly enough on the subject of Gamma-two I noticed something strange. While all the other subjects have been properly disposed of. There's no record of Gamma-two's destruction. I suspect some of the researchers that were terminated(jobs not lives sadly since this was before my time running this place) may have smuggled her out. Possibly even going so far as adopting her. Still that's of little consequence since all objective records indicate her being worthless. But that's enough of a deviation from Beta.

 

Beta today has been rather inquisitive. Repeatedly coming up to the window and making direct eye contact with me. It's a bit unnerving since I've never seen a subject make such a deliberate action towards me. That said despite his massive potential(this is why he and the other one are both kept around despite little progress over the 16 years they have been in the program) I can't find any sign of aggression. As the previous records have mentioned Beta and Gamma are both voracious eaters. Genuinely it would be disgusting if it wasn't so impressive. That said the chair they have placed for observation and the camera are horrible. Just an absolute out of date abomination. I've already placed the orders that they are to be replaced and updated. I've also made it clear under no circumstances are the subjects allowed out or to be hurt.

 

In some ways they rather remind me of feral children. Only larger obviously. Supposedly according to some of the records they are in fact capable of communication. The issue is only a few mention it. So it's unclear if perhaps around some they display different behavior. Ah looks like their laying down together now. Hopefully not about to prove me wrong. Yup they are proving previous observations correct.

 

It seems to be a nonsexual sharing of body heat. Beta seems to be laying against Gamma who is on her back. Resting his own head across her breast tissue. They seem to be hugging albeit it's more Beta doing it.

 

Fifteen minutes of watching them and suddenly Beta has gotten back up. He's walking towards the glass and making eye contact. What, did I just see this right? It looked like he's eyeing me up and down. Some degree of confusion? Oh dear lord what is he doing. Beta has spread his arms along the observation panel like he's hugging. Also I've noticed he appears to be in early stages of sexual arousal? So why is his display not towards Gamma? The more I observe the more questions I seem to be getting.

 

I also noticed there seems to be a lack of any physical description of Beta in old records. To that end I intend to make sure photo documentation is made. In liu of that for now I'll describe his appearance.

 

Beta is shockingly tall, looks to be around 1.8 meters(I'm a bit tickled that he's taller than I am). He has the messiest mane of brown hair I have ever witnessed in my life. It goes down to about nipple height. In regards to his body's build the closest approximate visually I can think of is a swimmer. He's deceptively thin with rather visible musculature. Hardly body builder visually, but from what I have read his muscle density is off the charts. Suffice to say with his build and those test results(and on top of that those are pre-puberty results. Lord knows where he is now) I am relieved that the panel is in fact transparent Aluminum.

 

His features are rather sharp face wise. And yet there's a strange softness to them as well as his eyes. It's rather disarming and does help to explain why the last scientist tried to commit the foul of freeing them. I can't help but find myself angrier at that attempt after seeing the specimen myself. I find myself looking forward to viewing him. Though I'll confess; him staring at me and getting erect is a bit unnerving.

 

I digress though he seems to be trying to hit the panel now. Not sure what he hopes to accomplish. Though none of the old diary's mention this occurring before. Oh fuck. He's caused a crack in the panel to appear! This was not within expectations. I'll have to order a stronger one installed . Though weirdly he's got a smile? That's a smile I think. Yes that's definitely a smile. He's now pounding on the panel and smiling. It should hold, but for now today's entry will end.

 


	2. Renovations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for the positive response. As I mentioned in the first chapter this will be a more rapid update cycle. Probably not daily but easily better than my 2 week update cycles hah.

**Subject Beta**

**Observation Record**

**Date 05/11/2xx3**

 

It's been 30 days since I was last in this enclosures proximity. I determined that it was woefully out of date and ordered retrofitting to be conducted post haste. We've moved from a physical observation window to contact less walls. The cost was high but the freedom to readily enter or exit is worth it. Apparently while they did the demo work they found some old drives. I intend to take a look at those another day.

 

On to the subject of the enclosure itself. Where before it was stark and brutal, nothing but concrete really. The updated one takes it's cues from nature. I insisted that a natural sky light be made of a similar system albeit with a close able roof. If my reading is correct they have never seen nature or sunlight before. So the newly planted trees and associated foliage should make for an interesting response.

 

They've brought Beta and Gammas individual containers and attached them to appropriate points. I'll be viewing from beside them so that they won't immediately see me before the changes.

 

I'm now opening the cages. Gamma seems to be leaving it first. She looks to be very hostile though rapidly calming if the vital scans are correct. Beta is also now leaving his cage. He seems rather confused and overwhelmed by it. Perhaps I made a mistake in trying to bring them back to a more natural- I stand corrected Beta just sprinted at a mad dash at the tree. It made a rather loud noise when his head hit it. Concern over possible injuries is unnecessary Beta is rolling across the ground. Rather like a dog that has gotten let into the yard after a day indoors.

 

I've noticed an anomaly, Beta appears to have sprouted claws with the hint of fur. As well as a tail. It seems to be wagging rather like a dog. Visually it more resembles a monkey. It seems to be significantly more prehensile than any dog or cats. Gamma is displaying no such similar permutations but is however sunning herself.

 

Gamma has just noticed me. She's staring but seems surprisingly non hostile. I think on some level they may already know they can't get through. I stand corrected Beta became aware of my presence immediately after gamma began making noises and rushed the contact less system. I am rather relieved that it held with no sign of any issue, he was running fast than I've ever seen a human run. He started crying and hitting at what I will hereafter refer to as the “wall”.

 

I've decided the moniker of crybaby is especially appropriate with his ability to shock himself and start crying. More interestingly I'm approaching to take a closer look at his permutations. They seem to be visibly gaining fur up to the knees and elbows. The musculature seems to be a departure from his previous build.

 

Beta seems to be observing me back I've realized. His tail seems to be lashing back and forth, perhaps a sign of stress or viewing me as a threat? He's now glancing back and forth between Gamma and myself. Are they secretly communicating? If so how? Beta's starting to blush and Gamma has a sadistic grin plastered on her features. I must confess as unnerving as this is I find myself fascinated. If this is in fact actually what is occurring I must figure it out.

 

Beta is walking away from the “wall” now. I must confess I'm a bit disappointed if unsurprised. Beta seems to be looking around the enclosure. Ah he's just now discovered the flower bed. I do hope he doesn't tear it all up. Beta seems to be inhaling the scent now. I'm not sure what to call the look on his face if not a smile. Though it has far more fangs than the normal.

 

Gamma seems to have gotten up and is now climbing a tree. Remarkable how quickly they seem to learn despite never having had any exposure.

 

Beta is back again only this time he stopped just short of the “wall”. He's got both hands behind his back like he's hiding something. I keep trying to peak behind his back. Beta keeps shifting to keep it hidden. His face is solid red, did the flowers have some sort of unforeseen effect? Gamma is now laughing at him. This was unexpected. Though it makes sense given laughter seems universal even in the absence of a loving mother.

 

Beta is making noises at Gamma now. I'm not sure what to call them outside that. He looks rather irate and his tail is thrashing.

 

His focus has turned back to me. He seems... bashful? Surely not. Beta's showing me his enclosed hands and making a shushing motion. Have they learned by back observing? He found a lizard and is showing it to me? He looks positively alit with curiosity.

 

I must confess I half expected him to try and give me a flower. Oh the lizard got away while he had his hands open. But he's not making to chase it. Beta's placed a shaky hand slowly on the “wall”. He seems to have already figured out that so long as he doesn't try and force it that it won't cause harm. His hands are much larger than I thought. I've placed mine on top of the other side to compare. Looks to be easily fifty percent bigger.

 

Beta is staring at me again. His face is flushed. He's stormed off now. That was unexpected. Perhaps he's suddenly in the mood and I'll witness a mating?

 

My speculation was wrong again. He broke some dead tree limbs and is now braiding Gammas hair. This is another behavior that was absolutely not mentioned in the previous observations. I feel that I may be best served by disregarding nearly everything from them.

 

I'll have to continue observing the best I can. I may use my authority to commandeer this room and make it into my office/quarters. For now this will be the end of this record.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Any sort of feedback is welcome!


	3. White Elephant

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Genuinely I'm having a lot of fun writing this. I'm able to sit down for an hour and have a chapter that feels enjoyable.

****Subject Beta** **

****Observation Record** **

****Date 05/13/2xx3** **

 

Upon entering the observation area today I was witness to Beta and Gamma laid out in the sun. That part was uninteresting. What did however suprise me is that they had gathered up a massive pile of leaves. Frankly I'm not even sure where they got them from. Perhaps plucked from the trees?

 

Further still I noticed that Beta's tail seems to be a confirmed condition. Not simply a delusion of a sleep deprived observer. I've come to the conclusion his tail works on dog rules. That is to say when excited it wags. Additionally I've begun to make notes on both his and Gamma's bodys. While initially I failed to notice it I have become aware. Both Beta and Gamma lack significant body hair.

 

It's so atypical that I'm confused to how I didn't notice it. For all intents and purposes they lack arm/leg/pubic/armpit hairs. With only Beta having much in the way of noticeable pubic hair, which seems to be only noticeable thanks to what is colloquially known as the happy trail. While it's possible it could simply be genetic variance the more likely answer is that it is in relation to their true bodies.

 

On the subject of their true bodies none of the old observation records mention those. I was however able to find information that gave me an idea what Beta's looks like. Apparently his anomalous side is a direct inheritance from a previous specimen. Said specimen being Specimen WA31. The images I was able to find for WA31 were reminiscent of the claws and paws that Beta displayed. Unfortunately most of the old specimen records are either damaged or corrupted entirely. So the odds of finding anything on Gamma are low.

 

Still that's fine since Beta displays the more useful things. I've been debating whether the research that was used to produce him could produce viable guard dogs. Albeit highly intelligent and dangerous dogs.

 

Gamma has started to stir. She just kicked Beta in the side. Beta is now up and chasing Gamma angrily. Their bodies are visibly changing as they run. Gamma's reminds me somewhat of an arachnid. That part is new knowledge. Beta has only done his arms and legs. He's very fast, but he seems to have poor agility. He just ran into a tree.... Gamma is laughing at him and he's crying, albeit lightly. For him anyways.

 

Beta and Gamma seem to have made up. It looks like Gamma whispered something to him. Still trying to figure out a way to decipher what degree of communication they have. They both disappeared up into the trees foliage. Perhaps I shouldn't have had the tree planted...

 

It's been fifteen minutes and they still haven't come down. Though I have heard plenty of leaf rustling so things appear to be fine. Beta just jumped down from the tree. He's holding something and running toward me. He's definitely learned the boundary of his enclosure he stopped just short.

 

He's showing me a lizard again, why? The only thing noticeable about this one is that its albino. He keeps presenting it and frowning. It's like he's a child waiting for praise. I'm going to try giving him and Gamma each a piece of candy.

 

They sniffed at it nervously after I set it down in the enclosure. Gamma seems to be the one to figure things out quicker because she just put it in her mouth. Apparently squealing is either innate or learned with them. Gamma just did so while dropping onto the ground and rolling around. Beta is now picking up the other piece and giving it a tentative lick.

 

Well that was interesting... I'm not sure what to call that noise Beta made, but if I were to classify the face he made it would be ahegao. It's interesting to expose them to stimuli they have no experience with. I find myself wanting to directly interact with them.

 

If I find over the next several days that doing so is safe I believe I will try it. Beta seems to always look very lonely when I leave. Like a child that's fighting the urge to cry and throw a tantrum.

 

I've gone ahead and also instructed that the quality of their feed be improved. No more of that processed shit. I want to see if a proper diet will improve their condition. It's also possible some lingering sympathy to see things that look like humans being treated like lab rats. On the other hand emotionally they seem far better than humans. They can be kind and cruel. But there is little lying.

 

Beta is especially interesting since his ever action and reaction is painted on his face and sleeve. It's interesting because that was also noted by the previous researchers. Specifically the Fudo couple made note of it. That of all the subjects he seemed to be the most human despite being decidedly better. After all the experiments they did already proved you can cut them up and they still won't die.

 

Beta seems to be staring at me again. I've noticed he does this a lot and the second he realizes I've spotted he flushes. So right now I'm observing him via a camera. They seem to have no concept of the idea they can be watched without someone being there. Wait.

 

I'm using a tele-zoom camera on the opposite side of the enclosure now. If I'm interpreting his line of sight and the direction he isn't just starting at me... I might be wrong but it's almost like he's mistakenly interpreted me as being a female and therefore a potential mate. This is rather confusing. Although I suppose since to him nudity is the natural state someone with my appearance is outside of his previous experiences.

 

Part of me is flattered though I suppose that's not really an observation. Perhaps I should put more effort into trying to couple Beta and Gamma up. Perhaps we can get more subjects naturally that way.

 

Beta just started to frown. I'm not sure what has him upset? Perhaps like a dog he feels ignored. Against my better instinct I'll reward him with a head pet before going. He reminds me of my old dog John. That will be all for the day.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you liked it please let me know. Be it commenting or kudos.


	4. Of Endings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter brought to you early by insomnia! It's your friend(not)!

**Subject Beta & Gamma**

**Observation Record**

**Date 05/14/2xx3**

 

Today has been an interesting day. But first I must make note that my attempt to succesfully touch Beta with no reaction went through with some small hiccups. Initially he leaned into my head rubbing his head. However a few moments later he processed it and fled. He refused to come back into sight. Gamma merely seemed to huff a bit then go to check on him.

 

My running theory on this is the contact with me was not unpleasant. But rather like many important lab subjects his past experiences have led him to fear contact. Such a situation is untenable. If he cannot be broken of it then it is likely Beta and Gamma are without merit and will need to be disposed of. I find myself disliking this prospect. Especially with the knowledge that they are physically far stronger than any human. Likely as well the last chance we have of salvaging anything from the program that created them.

 

I have gone ahead and brought a sleeping bag and other such necessity with the intent of an overnight stay. A proper bed has been ordered so that I can begin attempting some degree of socialization of them at all times.

 

Initially upon my entrance to the observation deck Gamma seemed to be watching me. No sign of Beta yet. He seems to still be hiding. This is alarming since to date every other occasion has resulted in his near immediate attention. Still it's good to see Gamma does not share the same fears. Perhaps even if Beta cannot be corrected I can use the results for Gamma and argue for their merit.

 

It's been half an hour, still no sign of Beta. I didn't want to have to do this but I feel like I have no choice but to try and bribe them into sight. I've gone ahead and placed two candies into the enclosure. Gamma has taken hers. She still responds to it with visibly excitement.

 

She seems to be growling and making noises now. Perhaps trying to tell Beta there's something for him? Five minutes have passed I am becoming worried, Gamma appears irritated. She just stomped off into some slightly overgrown bushes(I may not have thought through the consequences of living plants adequately...)

 

She's dragging Beta out by his tail! Is he sick? He's not moving much. I can see his chest heaving every so often. Gamma keeps poking and prodding at him.

 

Beta just made an exceedingly pitiful noise. As loathe as I am to metaphorically throw myself to the lions. We cannot afford to lose a valuable subject. If he has not begun moving in ~~twenty~~ five minutes then I will need to enter and possibly provide life preserving care.

 

Two minutes have passed. I'm getting more nervous the pitiful noises are increasing and Gamma seems morose as well.

 

It's been four minutes but I can no longer stand to watch and wait. Beta has assumed the fetal position. If I fail to act now we could lose Beta. That is unacceptable. If this log does not continue it means I was ripped to shreds.

 

All is well. Rather things were interesting. Upon my entrance Beta remained prone, however Gamma moved away from him. I made haste towards him and quickly rolled the lump of muscle onto his back. It was only once he was on his back that the wails were full volume. Initially I suspected a heart problem due to him clutching his hands to his chest.

 

The answer was far more mundane and arguably childish. In his hands he was clutching the a white lizard(the same from yesterday?) It appeared to have been crushed at some point. I believe this may be his first actual experience with death. They were never given access to living breathing creatures. It's always just been Beta and Gamma. Before then there were once more subjects. They were all disposed of quietly and out of sight.

 

Once he realized I was there Beta stared at me. As if expecting me to just magically fix it. All I could do was sit in silence and gently pat his head. Eventually I think he understood that it was gone. He dropped it's remains dejectedly before hiding in the treetops. It's strange to realize how many common concepts they have no grasp of. How terrifying it must be to be so strong only to find out things die. Perhaps he's realized what happened to his now gone compatriots.

 

I could tell he was still watching me so I took the time to dig up a small hole. I placed the remains within. That concludes the observations from my ten or so minutes within.

 

Gamma has come back to the wall. Closer than I've ever seen her come. She seems to be making direct eye contact with me. Gamma has taken the other candy and seems to have taken it to Beta. I'm surprised she didn't eat it herself but it's also been just the two of them for a long time. It would be stranger if she didn't look after him.

 

I've gone ahead and authorized the best possible meats be fed to them from here on out. No more of the ground and processed junk. Truthfully I'm not sure how to deal with this since the concept of mortality never bothered me. Beta seemed more than slightly distraught at it being thrown in his face. Perhaps I should have ordered the lizards removed the second I became aware of them. Regardless this is my mistake. I will not make it a second time.

 

I've gone ahead and lain my sleeping bag right by the observation. I intend to watch them while laying down. Beta's sobbing seems to have largely quieted by now. Eye's feel so tired. I'll just rest them a minute.

 

I fell asleep. What's worse I woke up to Beta laying opposite of me asleep. Uncertain how long I've been asleep at this point. Some of his hair looks to be braided now. Gamma is laid out on the pile of leaves. I'm rather confused by Beta choosing the cold ground for relatively warm and fluffy leaves.

 

From up close like this I can really see his face better. There's a subtle softness to all the sharp edges. Before father roped me into all this he's very much the sort I would have likely hopped into bed with. Except he's a massive crybaby. How funny to think a non human subject would be physically my type with the most off putting behaviors. His eyelids are still puffy and red despite his enhanced recovery. Perhaps for mundane things it doesn't kick in.

 

Still I am tired. Why am I so tired? All I did was deal with this crybaby... for now sleep and more observations in the morning.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again thank you to everyone who has left a comment whether I have replied or not. It means a lot to me and helps me to keep feeling encouraged. To that end when I couldn't fall asleep I wrote another chapter.


	5. Bird Baths for Bird Brains

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not sure how I'm doing this but the impulse to write hit again. I swear the next one won't be for at -least- 24 hours! >.<

****Subject Beta** ** **& Gamma**

****Observation Record** **

****Date 05/15/2xx3** **

 

When I woke up Beta was still laying there. Thankfully his breathing and activity was obvious. I've also learned that apparently the subjects are capable of nocturnal emissions...

 

In a morbid way it's impressive just how much was released. I've decided I'll hose him down when he wakes up. He looks surprisingly peaceful looking despite being a sticky mess. I've gone ahead and prepared the hose and I am now simply reading a book while waiting.

 

He just woke up and I turned the hose on him immediately. He made a most undignified noise when the cold water hit. It was rather interesting seeing something six foot tall and so muscle bound he could rip me in two; run in a panic from a water hose. Fortunately the high pressure seems to have done a good job of removing the offending genetic material.

 

Beta is now staring at me from behind the large central tree. I believe it's an apple tree. Does he perhaps feel betrayed? Do they feel betrayal and other human emotions?

 

Gamma is doing it again, what I can only describe as laughing at Beta. She's pushing him back out into the open. Perhaps she recognizes that the hose isn't a threat or punishment but a method of cleaning. Perhaps they have never been exposed to anything more than small amounts of water. Were the previous researchers so inept as to fail to do basic cleanliness regiments.

 

Good lord. I just noticed, Beta's skin tone is several shades lighter now. He was covered in grime! Have they -ever- been given a bath or shower? This is absolutely unexcuseable. These are our precious resources. I've sent an immediate request for a bathing facility as well as suitable soaps and such.

 

For now I am content to watch Beta pout while Gamma rubs his nose in his cleanliness. It took 15 minutes but Beta ceased pouting. He seems a bit curious over the newfound smooth texture to his skin. I'm having to resist the urge to spray him again.

 

It took them three hours... and what do they send but a fucking kiddie pool! Do they think I am fucking around?!? I am the director of ongoing subject research. That title is supposed to mean something for fucks sake... they could have at least sent one that wasn't covered in children's cartoon characters...

 

At least they sent proper soap and such. Now the question is will they use it? I've gone ahead and scooted the “bath” into the enclosure. I refuse to record it as being a proper bath. This is insulting to my pride to not be able to put forth the best care. I've begun filling it with the hose.

 

Beta and Gamma have both approached the filled “bath”. They seem awed by that much water in one place. More excitingly they keep pointing at the water surface. Specifically their reflections. At first they seemed afraid but they've rapidly figured it out. I'm going to try spraying them. Perhaps it will entice them to try if they are already wet.

 

Beta and Gamma are both soaking wet... and still neither will enter the kiddy pool. I'll have to take things into my own hands. I feel relatively confident neither will hurt me. So with that in mind I will enter and personally teach them to wash.

 

That took entirely too long, and yet I find myself somewhat amused despite being soaked to the bone myself. Initially when I entered I was able to get Beta and Gamma to come closer. The second I began indicating the “bath” Beta fled. Perhaps he's more of a cat than a dog...

 

Gamma however displayed no such cowardice and I was able to direct her to to sit in the “Bath”. She seems to rather like the water now that it is running warmer. Perhaps I should have tried that instead of cold on Beta. It took only a few minutes to get the grime off her. The bathwater is absolutely filthy. Is this 18 years worth of grime? It took a minute but she finally got that I wanted her out of the bath. When she saw me tip it to empty she assisted. Her strength is just as alarming to witness as Betas.

 

As I began refilling the bath Beta snuck up. How was he able to move so silently? Surely I should have heard him breathing. Perhaps breathing for them is somewhat optional? I digress. He pushed me in to the bath. Unfortunately for him I managed to snag him by his no good scruff, and pull him in. A good lather of soap and the assorted bubbles made Gamma curious enough to also enter.

 

Gamma seems to enjoy the soap. Beta far less so, thankfully Gamma's presence seemed to have caused Beta to be reluctant to leave. Perhaps a desire to not leave a prospective mate along with another suitor? Beta kept glancing at me with a hint of red on his face. Perhaps some degree of male aggression and attempt at displaying dominance. It might explain why he kept splashing me.

 

I managed to get them both to sit still long enough to hose them down and get the soap off. Beta fled the bath immediately after. Gamma simply trotted off to stand in the sun. I've come to the conclusion that while Beta is without a doubt the pinnacle of muscle. Gamma is clearly the one with the brains. I'm only now noticing how shockingly well taken care of their hair is. Do they trim it? If so how?

 

With that accomplished I exited the enclosure and begun writing this. I'm going to get a towel and try and dry off.

 

Good lord my clothes are practically transparent. This is what I get for being vain and having an interest in high fashion... Ryo Asuka you are the most oblivious son of a bitch when you're absorbed with observing...

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again all comments and feedback are loved and appreciated. They're the +5 magic longpen!


	6. Emperors new suit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I've noted in the past there is dark subtext but most of it won't be explicitly talked about. That said I have no intention on this being a sad story.

****Subject Beta** ** **& Gamma**

****Observation Record** **

****Date 05/16/2xx3** **

 

I awoke to the noise of my phone ringing. They've come to deliver some appropriate office furniture as well as a fold away bed.

 

Interesting observation both Beta and Gamma hid as soon as the workers came in. How queer they never displayed that behavior towards me. I can tell Beta is still watching though his tail is hanging out of the trees and flailing aggressively. Perhaps it's the uniforms? I am after all as a director of research free from those horrid things. Perhaps they remember the previous observers and have an association of the uniforms to them.

 

Regardless I'll have to test that a bit later. With the additional equipment I requisitioned; I hope to be able to crack the encryption on these old drives. I have reason to believe that the encryption is based in our own prototype quantum system. If so then gaining access may be impossible. Still the amount of missing logs is alarming. It essentially makes up nearly a decades worth of time. All the records I have would be while Beta and Gamma were in juvenile state.

 

The workers have finally left. Beta and Gamma still seem reluctant to come out. I'll give them half an hour. After which I'll drag Beta down by his tail end if I have to.

 

It's been fifteen minutes I'm getting a bit tense.

 

Twenty minutes... dammit stop making a fool of me.

 

Huh, well that was surprising Gamma jumped from the tree. While she did so she grabbed Beta's tail and dragged him down. He made a most undignified Yowl. They are in the midst of a tussle. At this point I'm starting to think Beta may in fact just be a moron. Still there's something... unique about him.

 

They finally ceased tussling. Beta actually came out on top. I take that back... he would have except that Gamma pulled his hair.

 

They seem to be settling down now thankfully. I was concerned that they would stay agitated.

 

Beta's standing at the field pressing up against it while looking expectantly... what does he want? Food? I'm at a bit of a loss to some degree. Though I suppose they are animals and like any animals they are social. Perhaps he's begun to view me as a member of his pack? After all I did safely enter and leave the enclosure to bathe them.

 

I suppose it's worth taking risks if it gets better information that might make them usable. I keep thinking Beta and Gamma would make good guards. Albeit only for things of the highest security level since I suspect they can rip a man limb from limb.

 

That just happened. I'm officially exceedingly confused. I entered the pen per the normal. Beta weirdly enough kept a greater distance from me than ever before initially. Once I was a bit further into the enclosure I began to hear rustling noises from the bushes. I've come to the conclusion that at the time he was stalking me. This was of course strengthened immensely by him suddenly pouncing on me.

 

I'll probably have a few bruises if these tender spots are anything to go by. But I think it's apparent he wasn't trying to hurt me. The confusion only grew from there though.

 

Gamma made a slow approach, her arms shifting. That was a first and fascinated me until they were getting close to my chest. I'll confess I had come to the conclusion I was about to be killed and possibly eaten. What I did not expect was her to shred my clothing while Beta man handled me. Inspecting my nude form.

 

Beta is very strange and it flustered me a bit when he initially sniffed my pits. It was only when he licked me and I made a most undignified noise that they both seemed startled. From that point I beat a hasty retreat without any issues. Strangely enough when I looked back Beta was staring at me, and it felt... not human, but not like a mindless beast.

 

I'm starting to wonder if perhaps they secrete something that can effect outside agents. Thankfully I made sure to have plenty of my clothing brought here since I have decided I will be staying here. Though I think I'll be making fewer trips into the pen now. Also the scraps of my clothing including my designer thong are not visible anywhere...

 

I'm going to try and avoid thinking about it. Why is this room so damn hot. I've turned down the AC temperature.

 

Beta and Gamma are staring at me. Beta looks... very red, and small? Gamma however has the most shit eating grin I think I've ever seen. It's like looking at a cat who just pushed glassware off a table causing it to shatter. Beta isn't breaking eye contact even when I'm staring back. This is a first. Perhaps it means he's recognized that I am also male?

 

This is extraordinarily unnerving in a way I haven't felt since I went through treatment at fathers demands. It's like Beta and Gamma are looking straight through me.

 

I've gone ahead and put some of the premium meats that were delivered into the enclosure. They've wasted no time getting right to them. It's funny they can be so agile, so quick. Then when they eat it's like looking at slobs.

 

Beta's come up to the wall again. He's carrying a piece of uneaten food. It's been placed right in front of me. He seems to be getting finicky the longer I stare. Huh. Not sure how I never noticed it before but he has very pretty amber eyes. He's crying again? What is it now. I don't understand...

 

Beta retreated into the trees again. Perhaps they have a sort of nest up there? Gamma is just glancing from me to somewhere in the trees. I'm making a note of whereabouts she's looking. It might enable me to get a camera that looks at their nest.

 

For now that will be today's observation log. Well that could have all gone worse.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, if you liked it or didn't feel free to leave a comment.


	7. Nightmare Interlude

****?????** **

 

It's bright. I can see forever. My skin is abnormally white. Where it was always pale it has become like starch. Brilliant and glowing within this empty place.

 

I'm falling and my wings, they do nothing. They cannot save me. It hurts and I feel everything. Where once there was brilliance it now fades to nothing. The heat is gone. I am scared, crying and I don't know why.

 

Something is holding me down as I try and go back to the pin prick of light. Desperate for freedom as the fear grows stronger in my heart. It's so cold, I didn't ask for this. I didn't ask to exist. So why do I have to suffer? Oh god those ugly noises. Why am I making them. What's wrong with me.

 

The cold is fading... have I grown numb? Is this hell? Why me?

 

Heat is coming. I can feel it in my core. Massive arms circling my waist and pulling my fluttering wings into an unrelenting chest. Is this... is this love? He's holding me so gently.

 

Now I'm in his lap, those large hands grasping my hips. My own hands pressed to his chiseled chest. This feels right. Like the light that I was denied only in the form of a person. Then there is pressure as I feel him surging up. I'm gasping for air, writhing in his lap.

 

His expression is flushed, all angles with nearly no softness. But those amber eyes they see right through me. I'm calling a name, and it is not Beta. My voice is strumming the air, worshiping his touch.

 

This is no dream... no it's a nightmare.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I decided to go ahead and post this separate from the next chapter since it breaks the flow of the observation record setup. That said it's short so I hope people still find it enjoyable.


	8. John? the Companion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I was starved for Devilman media and learned about Devilman Grimoire. Worst MISTAKE ever.  
> #Wheremydiasastergaysat  
> #Fuckthisshit

****Subject Beta** ** **& Gamma**

****Observation Record** **

****Date 05/17/2xx3** **

 

Todays record begins with a summary of what occurred after I initially woke. It's been hours since I shot up in bed screaming from a nightmare I cannot even seem to remember an ounce of. Given that it provoked vomiting and general disoriented behavior I suspect it was one of the dreams my father would have beaten me for having. Even when he's been dead for a year I'm still not free from him.

 

I found myself stumbling out of bed while getting sick.(I'm beating myself up for sleeping in the nude, should just cave and wear silk sleepwear.) I remember seeing two luminous sets of eye's staring at me. Hearing the frantic lashing of an irate tail. The more I'm around them the more I come to see them as pure like John.

 

Somehow I stumbled and crawled my way into the enclosure. Even now I'm not truthfully sure why before passing out. The last sensation before I did however was being picked up.

 

I do however remember the dream/memory that occurred between. It was as if time rewinded. I was laying in my bedroom. My mother had just passed away a few days ago. I found myself constantly crying and unable to function. I resented and reject my father and my mother in all ways. Equally so I resented the new dog that had come to be part of our family just before she became ill.

 

They had named him John. Told me that he would always be my companion. I resented it too. But that day the little thing found its way to my room. Whining and crying as it scratched and tried to jump up onto my bed. When he finally did I still remember turning away and shoving my head under the covers.

 

The part I definitely know didn't truly happen was John not being John anymore. But a full sized Beta. Laying in my bed, yanking the covers away and licking my face. I sputtered and flailed falling out of bed as I tried to scoot away from him. Beta didn't stop, he kept coming towards me only now I could see his nudity. My own face and body feeling far too warm despite being sprawled out on hardwood floor.

 

For every centimeter I retreated he seemed to surge forward three. Before I knew it my body's clammy skin was soothed by him. Suddenly instead of simply licking my lips Beta shoved his tongue into my mouth. What sort of face was I making I wonder when he release my lips simply to hug me as tight as possible?

 

It was at that point I woke again. I was warm, exceedingly so on the count that both Gamma and Beta had taken me somewhere in the enclosure (the nest perhaps?) and were wrapped around me. I'll confess it was nice. Perhaps much like animals they can sense our distress and view me as a sort of master or pack mate? If that's the case why do they react so extreme towards those others.

 

Five minutes passed as I simply basked in their shared affection. My eye's finally adjusting to the dark enough. I noticed something I had failed to notice before. I feel like a failure for it. Beta is absolutely covered in scars. They may be old and faded. But there's no missing them. While it's true being a subject means you may be sliced open and operated on to some degree. This massive amount is... I cannot possibly comprehend any legitimate reason he should have so many. I began to rapidly check over Gamma(well the best I could clamped in the vice like spooning of two meta anomalies). She's also covered in these similar faded marks.

 

Is this the reason there are so few subjects? Was someone using their growing bodies as literal punching bags and cutting boards???

 

I couldn't help it but trace my hands across some of Beta's scars. Across his firm stomach, this isn't fair. Why is something so perfect so close but incapable of true consent? And yet I find myself growing more fond of them than I am humans in general. Eye's feel so heavy, I'll just rest a moment. I could hear Beta's heart thumping.

 

When I woke back up I'm not sure how long it had been. All I was certain of is now it was day. I know this because it was sunny and my bleary eyed ass could hear them chirping. As I refocused I realized shortly Beta was watching me. Also that I could make out my ruined clothing from the other day in the nest.

 

Like a fool I overreacted and pushed away from him. That was mistake number one. Mistake number two? Forgetting that the nest was almost assuredly in a tree. Beta seemed to panic as quickly as I did the second gravity did its thing. For some reason he rolled after me. I should be grateful since I'm sure I was about to make an undignified noise, but the shock of being in such strong arms as we tumbled through tree limbs shut my trap.

 

I found myself at that point plopped on his lap, Beta's back to the ground. He looked as confused and flustered as I felt as I ran out of the enclosure.

 

Gamma's laughter is as loud as I've ever heard it at this point. It sounds so much like a persons. But truly if these two were subjected to such excessive cruelty... maybe they are better than people? After all I've seen the darkness that lurks in men's hearts.

 

I manged to get dressed with some degree of grace. Beta seems to be lurking in bushes. I can only tell because he's so bad at hiding, if his tail isn't in sight his little face is poking out. It's hard to believe he can be so bad at something.

 

My mornings mess cleaned up with relative ease. I'm preparing a treat for both Beta and Gamma. Comforting me from a nightmare I can't even recall. Perhaps this project can save more than our future but our very souls?

 

Something about them is just so soothing. I don't get it. I want to know more. Now that my computer is setup I'm going to set it to cracking these drives. If my suspicion is right I may find the missing records. There's too many things I don't know about Beta and Gamma.

 

And I've realized I'm rambling again and failing to deliver a treat to them. Noticing my lack of snacks I noticed I did have one thing. I doubt they've ever gotten a chance to try chocolates. I dump several packets of Pocky out on a plate. Grabbing a single one for myself as I stick it over the field onto the ground for them.

 

It takes them a moment but they come. They both are sniffing and pawing at the plate curiously. They probably need a demonstration. So I chew the stick I have in front of them and make pleased noises.

 

They understand they can eat it now. Good lord Beta just shoved a fistful of them in his mouth. He looks like a chipmunk! Gamma isn't any better oh lord. I'm taking a picture of this for myself.

 

That's all for today I have errands I must run. Maybe get more treats for them...

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey so just a heads up probably no chapter tomorrow. Thanks for reading any and all feedback is appreciated.


	9. Sulfur saviour

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we are with another chapter. Please enjoy

****Subject Beta** ** **& Gamma**

****Observation Record** **

****Date 05/18/2xx3** **

 

The following is a a summary of the events that occurred before and after I awoke today. Something loud, possibly screaming awoke me initially. The room was dark at that time and I attempted to turn on the lights. No power was present. As I stepped out of my bed I ended up slipping across a puddle of at that time unknown fluid(It smells of sulfur). On further examination I determined it was yellow and warm, rather blood like in its consistency. More alarmingly there was another darker blood like substance that I would come to realize was blood.

 

It took me a minute to gather my wits that something was off. Once I began to examine my surroundings I realized there was a literal trail of foul smelling yellow blood. It led right up to the enclosure. The weird bit was that at the enclosures wall( power loss also seems to have made this non functional. Alarming) the trail was mingled with red and then turned to just red without the foul odor.

 

I realized immediately something was wrong as I followed the trail. Almost immediately as I followed it looking for where it led I tripped over a body sprawled out and heaving on the ground. Using my phone as a flashlight two things became obvious.

 

  1. This individual was still alive but had an arm missing.

  2. It was Beta and he was bleeding out shockingly quick.




 

I'm unsure how something like this could have happened to such a valuable subject. I find myself almost panicking at the possibility he might die. I even ripped my silk nightshirt into bandages just to try and staunch the bleeding. Carefully I dragged Beta out of the pen. Gamma noticed when I was most of the way out and came to my assistance readily.

 

With Gamma's help I was able to put this slab of nearly pure muscle up onto my bed. I'll likely need to replace the whole thing due to the amount of blood. Gamma found Beta's arm. I'm unsure where she found it exactly but I suspect it was outside the enclosure. What shocked me is what she did after finding it. I nearly flipped out and tried to throttle her as a byproduct of it. But she unbandaged and unwrapped Beta's stub and shoved the arm up against the cleave. Like the flesh would just stitch itself together.

 

What I didn't predict to happen while I kept trying to pull her away only for her to restrain me, was for Beta's flesh to literally begin knitting itself together. Severed arm and all. I think I now see why they are bother a bundle of faded scars.

 

I made a phone call to facility management demanding they get my power online. Someone had deliberately shut the breaker off. Almost immediately after my call the lights were on. Using my phone I went ahead and made a second one. This one to a close confidant requesting she bring me several vials as well as as many universal blood packs she could get.

 

It's been an hour, Jenny should be here soon if her last text is anything to go by. I'm presently sitting on the foot of my now blood smeared bed watching Beta's chest slowly rise and fall. I've listened to his heart several times, A defibrillator on standby in case. Gamma was by my side for the first twenty or so minutes. But after Beta's breathing steadied out she began to explore my office.

 

She just found my office chair. She's figured out that it swivels and is laid across a rapidly spinning chair making... happy noises? She's staring back at me while being twirled in circles... this is highly unnerving.

 

I checked Akira's vitals again. Everything is so low... and he's so cold...

 

A knock just came on the door in Jenny's secret pattern. The supplies are here. I have her stay outside while I fill the vials with both types of the blood that is on the ground to the best of my ability. Amazingly enough not all of it has clotted. I've given her the vials and asked that she get them checked. She used to work in this department so she knows the importance of discretion.

 

Jenny had the decency to bring an IV pole. This will make it easier. I've hung the largest pack up and am now in the process of administering. I hope Beta doesn't stir much...

 

He rolled and fiddled a bit but I got it in with one poke. I've used so much gauze to make sure it stays steady. Still he's so cold.

 

I'm so tired too. And he is in my bed. So it's only natural I get more sleep and also try and warm him up. I'll write more once I wake up to check on him again.

 

I managed to sleep for 4 hours. At some point while I was sleeping Gamma joined us on the bed. It's rather cramped. But it feels warm with Beta pressed against my breasts, Gamma at my back. Now that I'm more rested and Beta seems stable I'm taking the time to check the cameras with my phone.

 

Well this is alarming. Not only was the power off but the cameras weren't running either until after I called Facility management. Was this deliberate? All signs seem to suggest that it was deliberate but what -for-?

 

Gamma has gotten up and is pawing at her eye's owlishly. I wonder if before now they had never been in a proper bed.

 

This is a weird sensation to think about how subjects have been mistreated and to find yourself... mad? I think it's mad. Given that neither of them has murdered me by now despite ample opportunity perhaps I should increase their social exposure to myself.

 

I have placed a work order request for the installation of a king size bed. This dinky blood stained fold out will no longer do.

 

Beta is hugging me. Please father don't test me this way...

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Boobies, that's right it's intersex Ryo. I hope you've enjoyed this chapter.


	10. Fluffy bed nest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been jonesing out to "I would Die 4 U" while writing this. Sue me.

****Subject Beta** ** **& Gamma**

****Observation Record** **

****Date 05/19/2xx3** **

 

Beta is still sleeping at this time. The odd part is when I woke he was laid across my breasts. He looked rather comfortable. It hurt a bit to wriggle out from under him, feeling his almost molten heat slip away.

 

Is this how everyone else feels when leaving anothers embrace? To be this cold. Regardless that does not matter for some things cannot be allowed. I've taken the time while Beta and Gamma are still sleeping to punish myself.

 

Interesting note Gamma has found spare sheets and other things and made herself a cozy nest under the bed. Perhaps they don't feel comfortable in the open? More things to contemplate. I',m going to go through the supplies Jenny brought again. It's much too large for the request I made.

 

There's an awful lot of snacks and other such things in sealed containers. But the thing that caught my attention was a solitary scrap of paper. On it is a long string of characters. Something about this is too strange. I'm going to try plugging the list into the encrypted record drive.

 

It worked. I've got the drive decrypted, but it's a pyrrhic victory. Beta got mangled in obtaining this incidentally and much of the internal data on the drives records seems to be corrupt. That said there is some alarming information here. Specifically on how the subjects came to be. I was always told they were test tube crafted specimens.

 

The truth appears to be far crueler. I suppose I always knew but wanted to pretend it couldn't be. As of now I'll be encrypting my records far stronger.

 

Per research proposal “Treatise on controlling anomalies” the go to method was an early stage pregnancy being deliberately exposed to an anomaly. Further documents go on to reveal that not only was this theorized but it was put into practice a shockingly large number of times. Somehow we have all of two remaining subjects but this record suggests there was in excess of 150.

 

To put that in perspective it means there would be six or so subjects in each category. And yet only Beta-1 and Gamma-1 remain.

 

What's more alarming is that it appears my own father was the one at the head of this program. Rather ironic he would do such things while mother was pregnant with me.

 

Gamma is up and staring at me from under the bed. Those eye's of hers blinking owlishly. She's slunk out from under it now. Where Beta is a brute she is agile. If I had ever loved women I suppose she would be the sort I would adore most.

 

Oh well this was unexpected. Apparently she wanted the swivel chair, but I'm in it. Thus she decided that flinging herself across my lap and making us -both- spin like a top was a fine time. She's laughing in that shockingly satisfied way I only hear from her.

 

To think they were robbed of their mothers of a future. Who were they meant to be? Were they just the offspring of human trafficking and extreme violation of ethics? Yet before now I've never really cared about those things. People are all awful. Yet these two are... precious to me. Much like Jenny, an outlier within a world full of twisted sick fucks.

 

Beta is stirring. Making funny noises. I've gone ahead and scooted the chair to his side.

 

Those amber eye's just opened for the first time in a while. He looks very tired. Like he's struggling to process. Beta just noticed me and is propping himself up and scooting over towards me. I can't seem to break away from his eyes.

 

Oh thank whatever non existent diety wants credit Gamma just jumped on him and they are now squabbling and wrestling. Still it's a relief to see Beta seems to be back to one hundred percent. Witnessing someone with an arm sliced off and bleeding copious amounts of blood... is rather alarming. At least when that someone isn't a filthy human.

 

I think Beta and Gamma both could tell I was lost in unhealthy thoughts. I say that because they literally dragged me into bed and began to play with me like a toy! Ruined another perfect set of clothing just so they can stare at my nudity uncomfortably close.

 

So now I'm having to retrieve something to wear, only I think Beta is following me. I say think because I haven't turned around I suspect I'm being followed. Whereas Gamma is nearly silent when she does.

 

… He just licked my lower back and ran away. What the hell even is this! This is infuriating. I've gone ahead and yelled at Beta. He just scurried under the bed. But I can see his eye's staring out from under at me. I don't think I deterred him at all.

 

Still I'm curious to where Jenny got that code. That's not something you can just stumble upon... and Beta is chewing on my ankle. I don't really understand why he seems so desperate for my attention. I went ahead and pulled my feet onto the bed. I refuse to be his chew toy.

 

It's been three hours since my last entry. I feel like Beta and Gamma are both mocking me because as soon as I decided I would not be his chew toy they dragged me under the bed. I won't lie I think I screamed like a little girl when they pulled me under. It was rather different having Gamma pressing into my front and hugging me. Especially different and more than a tad alarming was Beta hugging me from behind... and truth be told I could feel his arousal... how can it be so hot -and- big.

 

More and more lately I find myself resenting my old man. The things he has done to me, the things he's done to others. Makes me rather wish I was no man. Perhaps then my own physical abnormality wouldn't cause such exaggerated responses. Perhaps the origins of these children are why the researchers flew in the face of policy and gave them names.

 

Akira and Miko... they both seem too soft to survive on their owns. Hopefully I can find ways to make them useful so they can have a future.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I want to try and cover dark/serious stuff but FLUFF is so important. FLUFF


	11. Waltz Interlude

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yup that's right it's another Dream. But these are all relevant. Just not necessarily obviously.

**???**

 

Everything is brilliant and soft.

They are seated upon a throne overlooking their lords and ladies. A soft hum of music giving them a tune to which they dance.

 

There subjects are endless. Visually striking forms of entwined beauty and ferociousness.

And their chest fills with pride as they cross boot clad legs over each other.

For they are the Morningstar. The redeemer and the savior. But it is a bitter sweet taste when their throne is built upon his bones.

 

Thoughts straying darker, ominous even as their second favored makes all possible attempts to lift their humor. But it is not enough and the heavens give way to a morose rain. The hidden beat they could not hear now ringing loudly with their ugly hearts weeping. For the lords and ladies no longer dance lively.

 

No instead they section to two sides, leaving an empty space in front of the Morningstar. A slow miserable Waltz of their bodies as even some of them shed tears for Lord Lucifer.Their own eye's blinking as golden tears drop fat with grief.

 

But this is not as should be. They know it isn't. And as if bid from beyond time a specter from memory strides forth. Clad in regal wear, boots of leather shiny to his Knees. Under the downpour of this rain his dark cloak clinging to his form. The dancing comes to a stop in shock. As if a ghost has just been witnessed.

 

It doesn't matter to them. Even if it's an illusion or a trick they cannot help but stand. Feet steady as they clack down the dais of the throne. Pace slowly picking up before they are sprinting, a trail of gold left to each side. They can see it, those amber eye's that dark chestnut hair.

 

He's extended a hand out graceful as he bows low to the Morningstar. As if to say pardon me for my lateness. He says nothing, for they need no words between them.

 

They have taken his hand, clasping it tightly with their other as their knight stands. His cloak giving way to reveal his dark uniform, regal despite numerous repairs. Then they are gasping for he has pulled close. Other hand grasping their hip. They can't help but grab his shoulder with their free hand as he pulls them along, a slow joyful waltz. They cannot look away from his face, too afraid if they do he will disappear.

 

But their Knight is calm where they are not. Their like but unalike boots each clacking softly with each rotating step. They move but go nowhere this moment shared between only them. Only his soft words breaking the comfortable silence as they continue to sway.

“I'll be waiting for you Lucifer.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed me deciding to produce a second little bit. I felt it makes up a bit for missing a chapter on tuesdays.


	12. Boiling point

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter fueled by my ennui.

****Subject** ** **~~**Beta** ~~ ** **~~& Gamma~~ ** ****Akira & Miko** **

**~~**Observation Record** ~~ ** ****Diary of Ryo** **

****Date 05/20/2xx3** **

 

I woke today in tears. But unlike all the other times where this has happened I felt... happy, elated, sublime as if I was running on the strongest of medications. I can't remember why I feel this way other than that I think I saw B... no Akira. I'm done calling them those designations.

 

On the subject of Akira and Miko they kept me under the bed with them. I woke with Akira clinging to me like some sort of octopus. When I tried to peel him off he just grabbed me tighter. I'm loathe to admit that I felt arousal and the familiar heat in my face. Oh and the familiar nausea I was forced to associate with such... feelings.

 

On the subject of that I'm finding more and more resentment against father. Everything I've found suggests that he's the original source and of such monstrous behavior. Though I'm not much better than him am I? After all I was thinking of them as subhuman. A product in search of a use.

 

Still it's warm under this bed with them. I'm wracking my brain trying to explain this all. The anomalies that I have seen recordings of, are compared to both of these two jokes. Akira's regeneration rate is phenomenal to such a degree that I'm confused to how it came about. So how did they manage to subdue such a high class one?

 

Oh god why... Akira just nipped me... on er my right nipple. It felt phenomenal. Damn it Akira stop.

 

I had to hit Akira to get him to stop. I'm starting to think there's a reason he and Miko aren't mating...

 

Delightful, I just noticed Miko has been watching the whole time. Nothing like seeing my shame put on display. For that matter Akira used to flee when I would scold him. Now instead he slinks back and watches like a hawk... if he's the hawk does that make me the mouse? I'm not sure I like this thought. But on the other hand he's never displayed any violence towards me.

 

I've managed to crawl out from under the bed. Akira kept trying to pull me back in by my waist and legs. It's rather nice to feel wanted.

I'm taking the time to fix some food. Nothing fancy but nutrients are a must.

 

Annd.... Akira took my bowl...

 

Perhaps letting them have free reign of the full room was a bad decision. And now he's trying to feed me a steak more bloody than his stub of an arm was the other day. Miko seems to be egging him on with almost chanting like noise. I keep hearing things at the edge of my ability to recognize it.

 

It's like the buzz of a mosquito, but voices.

 

Ten minutes now of Akira trying to feed me...I've decided I will no longer tolerate Akira attempting to feed me raw meat. I've broken out an electrical grill. It's hardly gourmet but it's significantly more bearable. Akira seems to be drooling visibly at the sizzling meat. I'm almost offended that he doesn't look at me that way.

 

Akira got greedy and tried to grab the grilled meat, he's discovered that “Fire hot”. Miko seemed confused as well by it, I couldn't help but laugh. It felt so nice to let that out.

 

I took pity on Akira and gave him the meat on a plate. It's humorous to watch him bounce it between his hands while chewing vigorously. Miko seems to have also noticed the lively way Akira is eating and has also brought a pile of various cuts over.

 

I spent an hour cooking meat for them. I say cooked but it's more like bleu. Honestly watching them eat would be a massive turn off if they weren't special in their own way.

 

I've gone ahead and contacted Jenny. I asked her for any documents in regards to the origins of the third wave program she has. She asked me if I was absolutely sure. The answer was obvious but if she's asking that it must mean the third wave is only the beginning of the ethical rabbit hole.

 

She'll be bringing them by tomorrow, she's also kindly arranged for the delivery of a larger bed. I didn't even ask for it. She always seems to know what I need even before I ask.

 

I feel tired and stressed. Akira is napping on the bed. So be it I'll use him as a pillow.

 

He's so warm. I feel like a glacier next to him. Cold and unfeeling while he seems to be a ball of fire. Is it okay for me to be this close to something so pure?

 

Oh god what just happened. One moment I'm laying across his chest listening to his heart and the way he breathes. Being soothed by the slow motion of it. The next I'm slapping him across the face because he grabbed my ass with both hands! Even worse despite me slapping him for all I'm worth he didn't let go.

 

It took me five minutes of resisting but Akira slunk off under the bed looking defeated. It actually makes me feel bad looking over the side and seeing him look so defeated.

 

I've been watching him while I fade in and out of sleep. Why is he so handsome. Why can't he be capable of consent... It's like seeing a sports car but not being allowed to ride in it.

 

At some point I fell asleep for a bit. Akira was looking me right in the eye's and perched on my lap. I expected a lot of things from this. A rough clumsy kiss had not been one of them. More disturbing he took it further quickly grinding and trying to work his tongue into my mouth. He went at that for a few minutes before grinning and slinking off all proud like.

 

Fucker couldn't just finish the job for me could he?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully you enjoyed it. This chapter marks the sexual tension beginning to come to a head. It also marks me moving it to the mature category since subsequent chapters are more likely to contain more explicit things.


	13. Sexy Octopus

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter has been a real joy to write since it marks the introduction of Jenny as a more important player. Also not sure if anyone has noticed but I've tried to name each chapter in line to what occurs in some way.

****Subject** ** ****Akira & Miko** **

****Diary of Ryo** **

****Date 05/27/2xx3** **

 

It's been a week now since my last proper entry. Supervising the subjects as well as the various work projects I ordered for this room has kept me busy. Jenny has come by regularly to visit and chat. Shes hinted and tip toed around her involvement with the phase three project.

 

What's interesting to note there is that Akira and Miko naturally flee to their nest for almost everyone and everything. Jenny is not one of these things. In fact irritatingly enough they both seem to enjoy touching and smelling her hair. ~~I'm not jealous~~.

 

More amusingly it was highly enjoyable watching Akira hide behind my legs like some kicked puppy when the replacement bed arrived. Stranger danger seems to be a real experience for him. I chose a bed capable of supporting under bed storage. At first I had hoped to make use of it but Miko was under it before they had even finished placing the mattress on the box spring curled up on a sheet. Ultimately this seems to be the way it will be.

 

I can't help but feel some degree of guilt for how skittish they are.

 

Well... how they are mostly. Akira nearly got violent when he saw a box cutter. I'm not sure how Jenny did it, but she managed to calm him down so he didn't maul the maintenance man. That of course just cements it further in my mind that she knows more than she's telling me. Not that she's ever attempted to hide that fact from me.

 

On a different subject I've received a request from in company for a sample of Akira and Miko's various fluids. I shot them down for everything but blood. The fact they were wanting cerebral spinal fluid is definitely insight to how invasive previous handling has been. After that request I ordered the installation of a new door. I may have gone overkill with the specifications given that it's 12mm thick and made of 1045 Steel. But then these two are like walking weapons to the world, so perhaps protecting them like they are is right.

 

On the subject of sleep lately it's been good. Too good really. I feel like a teenager again waking up stiff as a board, or with my eye's leaking. Only unlike then there's a body laying near me that's cuter than he has any right to be. Yet despite laying under the bed or even occasional by my side he's untouchable.

 

On that subject the bastard even got me worked up in what I can only assume was deliberate way the previous week. This week though? Nothing. I'm actually feeling fairly offended by the fact he would tease my affections and intimacy and then not even try to hold my hand... correction I'm not just a teenager, apparently I'm a love struck girl. How mortifying.

 

I've also begun attempting to teach them language. I say attempting because it's like trying to herd cats. On the plus side I've discovered they will both do what I want them to for chocolate. On the downside I now have to keep the chocolate in a safe or they will literally steal it in the night. Still it's interesting trying to get them to say basic words of write the basic letters. It's clumsy but they seem to pick it up relatively easy. Frankly given their age it's astounding their brains have so much elasticity remaining.

 

I've been trying to teach them to write their own name. Miko seems to have just about grasped it but for some reason the letter “O” seems to cause her behavior to become erratic. The first time she got to it in her name she started crying. It's strange that she would cry given they seem to understand little of the language.

 

Akira on the other hand... is a handful. Not simply because he's big strong and something of a good natured fool. But because his attention span seems to be subject to more whiplash than the passengers in my old sports car when I was still high as a kite. Also he's broken more writing utensils than I thought possible. I'm loathe to think what would happen if he was given a computer. Probably porn for days or a broken in half shell of a pc.

 

With that all written out that sums up the last few days. Today has been a bit of a deviation.

 

I slept in. Not only did I sleep in till late but Miko and Akira both let me. What was less normal is what I awoke to.

 

They wrote their names. And one might think that's a good thing initially, and they wouldn't be wrong. The problem is they wrote on **everything**... Akira even wrote his name on my chest... only he wrote it “Akira's”. I'm not sure where he discovered that but he only beamed at me when I noticed it in the mirror and stared at him. First the cheeky fucker gets me hot and bothered now I'm his thing? The weird part is I'm not bothered with being attached to him, no I'm bothered that he isn't mine. This was of course made all the worst when I talked to Jenny about it... that was mistake number two.

 

She kept teasing me, saying that he must be my soulmate. That I should just “wing” it. Like oh yes let's just wing it into bedding someone incapable of properly consenting, never mind that he's basically my ward. She found that even more amusing. And of course she kept playing coy about her secret to calming them down. Still it always calms me down when I'm able to talk to her. Maybe she's right to a degree. I'm certainly doing a piss poor job of not being pulled along at Akira's pace.

 

I find myself constantly looking to Akira. Even when there's no real excuse to. He's definitely caught me staring while my imagination was running wild. I've tried a few times unsuccessfully to get them to wear clothing, but they just shred it and add it to their nest... well except for the one time I tried to get Akira to wear one of my coats. For some reason they didn't shred that and he seems to use it as a pillow. I suppose it makes sense it is a plush one.

 

I took my eye's off him for a minute and Akira is staring me down like he's been betrayed. I think he heard me gulp loudly. He's stalking up to me.

 

I... what just happened? Obviously it happened but how what and why? Akira stormed up to me after a week of practically not touching me. Threw my laptop to the floor earning a shout from me before plopping himself in my lap. Like it was perfectly natural to do so before wrapping his arms and legs around my torso like the least sexy octopus ever. Oh and to add insult to injury to my poor ego I ruined my pants. Literally just because he started nibbling and kissing on my neck while rocking against my body. Does he fucking think he owns the place? But if I'm reacting this way what does it say about me?

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> RIP pants. We've all been there in some way shape or form. If you enjoyed it please feel free to let me know :)


	14. Candy Red

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was a fun chapter to read. The next non interlude chapter will likely be significantly more explicit and sexual.

****Subject** ** ****Akira & Miko** **

****Diary of Ryo** **

****Date 05/28/2xx3** **

 

So far this morning has been uneventful. Akira and Miko both have begun saying their own and each others names. It's like looking at excited toddlers. Both cute and yet it makes me feel immense guilt.

 

I've made the discovery they seem to adore colorful noisy cartoons. So I've taken the time to put some up on a projector to keep them distracted while I talk to Jenny.

 

I took entirely too long on that call, what am I a teenage girl... Akira of course chose the moment I had that thought to look at me and make butterfly's surge in my belly. Back to my talk with Jenny. I told her about what occurred yesterday, sans the fact a sexy tease made me blow like a virgin(I will never admit to this and with luck Akira will never be able to tell). She said something in response to it and my remaining guilt over the idea of consent. “If he doesn't want to have sex with you, you won't be able to make him. For that matter it sure sounds like he's giving the best affirmative of consent he can for someone denied a voice.”

 

What she said made sense... an incredible amount of it. I've gone ahead and asked her to come watch them to be sure no fools attempt anything while I go out for some supplies. Specifically I'm hoping I'll be able to teach them to communicate. They already seem to have understanding of their own names and seem to learn especially quick. I don't expect I'll be able to teach them complex science and math. But if I can just manage to make it so Akira is capable of true consent then... then I'll what?

 

There's the noise of an explosion from the projector that startles me. Miko and Akira are sitting shock still though Akira's forearms and legs have changed. His tail thrashing excitedly as he watched the onscreen violence mingled with sexuality.

 

A knock resounds from my door in Jenny's pattern. She's here to watch over them and as I let her in I note she has a large purse. I raise a brow. She simply proffers that she brought treats with that eerie grin. It's the grin I've come to notice every time she's plotting to make me look silly. She picked up on my suspicious and pulled a large assortment bag of candy from her bag. “See just treats”

 

I'm pretty sure she still has a trick up her sleeve... perhaps the trick is having them hopped up on sugar when I get back? Regardless I need to run these errands and I'm grateful I can trust her.

 

It's been 4 hours since I left. Ah what a wonderful feeling it is to go shopping for new clothing. I'll confess I even purchased some things I thought might look nice on Akira. Not that I think I'll ever be able to convince him to not shred them. Upside though I get free eye candy constantly with a side order of guilt. I'm also going to attempt trying to dress Miko up. Some of my clothing should fit her fairly nicely. One thing that rings true is all the subjects have bodies most would kill to have. Solid abs with a complimentary order of bubble butt.

 

Jenny sat legs crossed upon the couch flanked by Akira and Miko. A pleasant smile on her face as those pretty faces turned rapidly towards myself. Akira was behaving shockingly well, tail flailing excitedly and limbs moving about like he was fighting the urge to bowl me over. He's like a large overexcited puppy... apparently that part is excited too I noticed with a blush before trying to ignore it to talk to Jenny. She didn't stay long, something about a prior engagement but that I should enjoy the gifts she brought. This of course puzzled me but it sounds inline with the things she does.

 

I brought the bags into the room and placed them upon the bed. Pulling out a set of trousers carefully purchased to Akira's size. He's been watching me the whole time it looks like. I call to him and he's over before I have a chance to blink. Thankfully I'm able to get him to sit on the bed with a bit of work. Convincing him to sit still while I shuffle the pants up his thighs is a harder challenge. Thankfully he doesn't seem to mind too much. When I attempted to button them however it was like a switch was flipped.

 

He proceeded to flip me over him and onto the bed. Akira then rolled himself about while I was trying to make sense of what occurred and pinned me in place. I was acutely aware of a few things at this point.

1.Akira has possibly the biggest erection I've ever seen.

2.He placed his legs between mine and spread them.

3.There is a candy red collar around his throat.

 

That last bit caught me off guard as I tugged him closer trying to read the tag. Initially he seemed flustered as I read the tag. This was definitely Jenny's work “This ass property of Ryo Asuka”. Where the hell did she even find a place that would -make- that tag. Of course as I had that thought Akira caught his second wind.

 

Right hand grasping my chin as he made sure I looked him dead in the eyes while he kissed me. Bodily he was grinding against me. I tried to push him away but compared to him my arms are toothpicks. Thankfully it only lasted a few seconds before he pulled away with a wet pop.

 

What occurred next left me shell shocked. Akira spoke slowly and carefully first pointing to me and saying Akira's Ryo. As if that wasn't a shocker enough he then pulled the exact opposite. The resulting fire that was lit in my stomach only got worse when he resumed trying to crudely swap spit. How a mans tongue can be so prehensile I do not understand.

 

So that was how I spent the better part of the evening. Penned to my bed by Akira while he had a raging erection. It was not an entirely awful experience, and he even seems to be getting better at kissing. By the end he even managed to not bump his teeth into mine. Given the opportunity I might even do it a second time, especially if I find a leash for his collar...

 

I've also come to the decision that Jenny is right. He's perfectly capable of making the decision of consenting. Now if I can only deal with the underlying issues of my own, that simultaneously make me want to gag on his genitalia and hurl.

 

I settled into bed tired from both trauma and just generally sitting in a heightened state of arousal with the physical pinnacle of manhood pressing into me. Pillow feels a bit lumpy, like there's something inside the pillow case.

 

Oh god dammit Jenny... this is mortifying. She is presumably responsible for both the collar and now a leash tied up in a bow under my pillow. What is this some sort of joke about me needing more pillow talk?

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this main chapter. Up next is an interlude(these are all still relevant to what I'm doing)


	15. Interlude: "At the End"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Decided an interlude felt -right-

**???**

 

 

 

Twilight has come, the sun sets in a display of purples and crimson.

The land is ruined, buildings leaning to either side of them as they search.

Somewhere in this hell Akira is alone. Precious Akira

 

My feet are sore, the broken concrete cutting into it as quickly as they heal.

It is of little consequence as I search. Slowly circling towards the epicenter of this now dead city.

It is there that I see Akira. Perfect pure Akira standing and looking up at the sky.

I weep golden tears as I approach watching her closely.

 

Strong and slim. A body that hides its true ability.

Wild black hair that goes to just past her shoulders.

Oh how it had looked when we would ride together on her bike to school.

How soft she had felt despite the subtle layer of muscle.

 

She's looking at me now smiling in that sad way while crying.

“Lucy, I think this is the end.”

Perhaps it is the end, but I'm unsure of what it is the end.

Nor do I wish for it to be the end of us.

The very idea sends me into a fury my wings unfurling in a display of anger.

 

“I refuse to let you die here!”

My lips move but I don't seem to control them. It's like watching and feeling from behind glass.

Her sad smile droops at those words. Like she is disappointed.

Please don't hate me Akira.

 

“It's okay, this body is but a temporary shell. I'm not made like you Lucy.”

She's trying to comfort me but the red glow is growing worse.

He is coming and so are his angels.

So be it.

 

I fling myself into the air, hurling destructive light at every would be combatant.

My demons are fighting, it seems they laid low until this moment.

The clash between myself and God's army.

I hurtle through the sky only to be struck down.

 

My body slammed into the broken concrete by Akira.

I think to myself at least my final moments will be spent with the only one that ever mattered to me.

But as I look up at Akira I behold an impossibility.

Six massive wings rip free from her with a scream of pain.

 

They are coated in her blood, black and gray feathers glistening.

There's a seventh, warped about her head as she looks back at me.

She smiles, it's like looking at an angels angel.

“Do not fear Lucy. I will be your Albatross.”

 

And I am confused.

Her wings blot out the sight of that most prideful of monsters.

I have made mistakes and time and time again been just like him.

But this time I am not, will not be the one to slaughter humanity.

 

Every blow made at her glances away.

A subtle shadow flitting about on the ground.

But I can see it in your posture Akira

You're growing weak.

I was supposed to save you.

 

And Pride's own attack smashes into her.

Like a cliff against a massive wave she holds.

But I can see feathers flake from her head.

Blow by blow it is less a wing and more of a horn.

She is coughing and wheezing.

 

Please no!

Don't take my Akira away.

I beg, but he will not hear my prayers.

 

Every strike strips feathers away,

Those previously massive wings losing all majesty even as the stretch to the horizon.

Something is even more wrong.

Her flesh is cracking.

 

The horn upon her head is splintering.

The next blow causes it to fall with a loud thud.

There is no blood or scream.

She keeps standing even as the cracks spread.

 

No longer are they content to watch only Pride strike her.

The horde is attacking as well.

My Demons try to assist.

I've never been more proud of them than now.

But it doesn't matter.

All who try are slaughtered and those massive wings too give and smash into the ground.

 

Still Akira does not yield.

I can see her slight sway.

And then I see something far more wrong.

The cracks have grown from the stumps and are enveloping her body.

Flickers of shadows leaking out hungry for the light.

 

Pride has not noticed.

For if he had he would retreat.

How has this come to pass?

Is this what you meant when you said you were my Albatross?

 

The blows continue until at last one pierces.

She's brought down low with a fierce cry of pain.

But in that moment something horrific and dark lashes forth from the void that was her vessel.

 

A great shadow slinks up the ruined buildings.

Pride is preparing to judge Akira and myself.

I'm so sorry Akira.

 

A howl of terror rings out.

There is shock everywhere for the shadow was something special.

The old ones have come.

Their impish little sibling will be devoured for messing with their bastard children.

 

I crawl with my ruined body to Akira.

She cradles my chin with her hands looking at me with love.

It is only in her I ever truly feel love.

Her arms fall off with a thud.

There is no blood but I scream.

She merely looks at me sad.

 

Akira's body is in ruins.

I pray that somehow I can fix it.

As if a prayer being answered by the old ones Pride's own thick blood falls upon me.

It is enough to restore me.

 

I try to fix her.

Everything I can think of, it does nothing.

She whispers to me.

“I love you, and I'll be waiting for you Lucifer.”

These are the words she says to me as I clutch her crumbling form to my body.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed. I like to think I implied things well.


	16. My Red Thread

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There be lewdys below. But seriously this is a chapter that's been coming a while now and is more intimate in nature. I experimented a bit with how I wrote the scene so hopefully it's enjoyable.

****Subject** ** ****Akira & Miko** **

****Diary of Ryo** **

****Date 05/29/2xx3** **

 

Today started as the worst day I've had for a long while. Hair a mess, Akira and Miko running on sugar highs. You know, normal things. I thought it couldn't get worse with how they stubbornly refused to learn some basic commands.

 

I was wrong. He showed up. First it was a ringing phone call. The second I checked the caller ID I simply hung up right away. Then a litany of text messages which I then blocked.

 

At that point I was sure I was in the clear. That he was handled. Suddenly fierce knocked upon my door. I assumed it was just a delivery and opened it with a smile on my face.

 

And of course it was him. I should have known better. Not even a milisecond of realization and he's going off on a speel. “Hey there Ryo! I heard you have some new subjects that are eating up all your attention. I'd be happy to take them off your hands. At the least you have to let me see them!” It was like a thousand nails upon a thousand chalkboards.

 

I slammed the door on his face. The problem is when you've known someone for a long time that you've learned their behaviors they also do the same. The bastard shoved his foot in just in time to block it open.

 

That cocky fucking grin that almost looked like a carbon copy of me. “Oh cmon Ryo I'm your best buddy Michael! You gotta forgive me at some point. I made a stupid mistake and your dad found out. But I never meant for that to happen to you!” He looked genuinely sad, but frankly I didn't give a damn.

 

Realizing that I'd have to open the door to get rid of him; I plastered my best fake smile on while Akira and Miko seemed to watch curiously from under the bed. I flung the door open wide a plan solidly in my mind and I hugged him. “Old friend it's been so long!” I almost felt bad for how easily he fell for it. The second we broke the hug and he stepped back I swung my right foot up between his legs. The look of betrayal and pain on his face was divine.

 

“But not fucking long enough you backstabbing cunt.” I slammed the door shut on him locking it after so. After all it was entirely Michael's fault that I had ended up broken. That father had sent me off to be “fixed”.

 

Woozily I stumbled to the bed collapsing upon it, the beginnings of tears forming in my eyes. By the time I let out my first sniffle though Miko and Akira were flanking me. Miko cradling me in her lap while Akira hugged me about my waist. It's like they know my emotions better than I do.

 

I spent the better part an hour just being comforted by them. At one point Akira even squabbled with her over who got to hold me. Miko won that little contest, Akira simply moped for a bit in retaliation.

 

My tears have finally dried up so now that I have their attention I'm going to try and teach them a few commands. We'll start with stay.

 

That took a bit for the first command but the subsequent ones are being learned significantly quicker. Alarmingly so if I'm honest. It really illustrates Jenny's claim that they are perfectly capable of consenting. I went ahead and called Jenny up asking if she wouldn't mind taking Miko out for tomorrow evening. We'll test just how capable Akira is.

 

 

**Subject Akira & Miko**

**Diary of Ryo**

**Date 05/30/2xx3**

 

Jenny just came by in the morning to pickup Miko. She had a purple collar and leash for her. I'm starting to wonder if Jenny has some very unique interests. Feels like butterfly's in my stomach thrashing around and trying to make me sick.

 

Akira looks so confused and forlorn like he can't fathom being without Miko. I just want to tie him up and do... things. From here on I'll be writing what occurred based on memory as well as camera recordings.

 

I call to Akira. “Come Akira.” He's slow to respond but his long legs do lead him to me. My left hand grasps him about the collar gently pulling him while I affix the specially made candy red leash. “Akira, sit.”

 

His throat visibly bobs with a loud gulp. With the way his body is warming up and the subtle hints of arousal I think he's picked up on my scents. Long legs bend as he lowered himself to the floor. I can't help but circle him like a hawk, my eye's lingering on his chest, abs and of course his backside. He is my home sculpted in human flesh. I'm pretty sure I gulped and he seemed to stare at my throat.

 

But we're doing this my way, not his way. I need control if I'm going to get past this sickening state of arousal tinged with nausea. Drawing a silk scarf from my back pocket I wrap it around his face, blocking out his eyesight. When he goes to try and tug it off I whisper in his ears. “Stop” The conditioning has worked because despite his clenching hands he doesn't tear it free. No restraint I can easily put on him would ever hold. But everything he bears he does for me. My heart is quaking and rumbling in my chest even as I feel increasing blood flow to my intimate areas.

 

Akira is sitting there now, whimpering a bit. Like the worlds most dangerous pupped. I pull his arms back behind him as I wind black latex restraints around them. Those strong arms are now bound behind him. He struggles and resists a bit, but he seems to understand this is something I want.

 

At this point I'm positively trembling in excitement. Wasting little time I strap my clothing off and throw it into the corner. Right now nudity is far more useful than giving a show. But he needs reinforcement, a reward and so I place a gentle kiss on his lips. He's all too eager and hungry for more, trying to lean in, tongue probing at my lips before I pull away, right hand holding the end of the leash and giving it a little tug as I sashay to the bed. He takes small uncertain steps as I urge him on. “Come here Akira.” My voice is dripping with honey, for the first time in a long time it is genuine and not feigned.

 

Sliding into my bed I twist onto my back, arching slightly as I tug on the leash again. That candy red connecting us as I draw him to my thighs. I'm excited, I can feel my heart pounding as I gain a genuine pink erection. Akira's nose is twitching as he draws closer before the smell seems to tell him what is going on. In that moment I witness his tail springing forth and thrashing violently. That long tongue slowly drawing upwards from my mid thigh to my genitals. He doesn't hesitate when it slides across my length, but merely places gentle kisses upon it.

 

I see the way his body trembles in excitement. The way he wants me is readily apparent even when I can't yet see what is surely the most impressive of erect cocks. My face feels so warm, I'm so glad he can't see me blushed like a virgin while he nibbles and kisses my nethers.

 

I can feel his lips and nose dipping down. Like lightning a sensation strikes me as a wet wriggly muscle pressed into my puckered hole. I find myself very glad I took the time to be extra clean just for this. Akira seems to be humming a bit, slick tongue sliding in circles around my rim. It's cruel and affectionate all at once. As if he's trying to make me beg, but I refuse to beg. “Akira come!” Right hand tugs on the leash softly while the left grabs a fist full of hair to encourage him.

 

Just like that I feel him stretching me, mouth wide and latched upon me. It's only as this has begun that I notice something is off. No tongue should be this wide or this long. I'm left fighting the urge to moan and writhe on my bed not even a minute in. Toes curling in as I finally break and release a pleased moan. The way Akira's tongue curls and probes at me depths is perfect. I've had flings but none of which I felt strongly about. None of whom held a candle to -this-.

 

It's almost too much, overstimulating as Akira learns the ins and outs and suddenly it's a nonstop assault on my prostate. I'm clutching the leash to my breasts, both hands abusing my own perked teats. In this moment as I ride across pleasure I lost track of time. It's both alarming to see how short and yet how long Akira kept me in this pleasure bound state.

 

It finally ended as my back arched to the maximum. I couldn't even see Akira's head as my whole body arch, making me look at the headboard. And then just as it had all begun I gasped and flailed. Stomach being painted with an off white color. Somehow he'd worked my body like a fine instrument and with just his tongue and lips brought me to a bliss.

 

I could feel it as his tongue retreated leaving me gaped and slick. Wheezing breathe rolling from my lips I called to him. “Come Akira.” Awkwardly he crawled up onto the bed, even in my haze I could see the strain his poor arousal had caused him. Slowly I sat upright, my left hand reaching out and cradling his sack of seed. In both appearance and weight it seemed all too large.

 

“Sit Akira.” I bade him with as much authority as I could muster in my state. Thankfully he either didn't understand my state, or simply wanted to listen and did so. Standing slowly on unsteady feet I approached the nightstand, grabbing a clear plastic bottle from the drawer. Saliva was fine for just his tongue, but with big boys big tool I was going to need this. Emptying a generous amount on my left hand I spread it as best I could manage. Slowly shuffling back to Akira, awkwardly seating myself in his lap. His length sliding up the cleft of my ass.

 

I can't help but want to tease him even as I feel just how alive he is. “Akira” Whispering softly seductive as I can manage. The result is more immediate than I expect but there's a small smack as his arousal surges with more blood. Looking back at this thing is far too tempting to not do. In my club days this on size alone would have been the holy grail. But as I am now with Akira it feels so much more sacred than that, and yet so painfully carnal in the best of ways.

 

While I'd love to simply worship the sight of his altar a bit longer I can feel Akira shifting under me. He's eager and ready, I am much the same even if I'm flaccid at this moment. I lean into him pressing my breasts into him and enjoying the firmness of his skin. The noise that rolls from his lips is practically praise of me, of my form. In defiance of my father who abhorred my abnormalities he enjoys them. A manic grin is plastered on my face as I reach down slicking his length with my left hand as I lift myself.

 

It hurts, as stretched out as Akira made me; there's still a burning sensation as I slowly work on wriggling him in. My arms are wrapped around his neck. I'm gasping for breath and his breathing had picked up in intensity. I can feel his body subtly shift as he tries to thrust up while I hold still to acclimate. In this moment I feel like a cruel bitch, my teeth nip and tug softly at his right ear lobe. Oh my, even his gasps are pleasant. Everything about him has fascinated me since day one.

 

Minute by minute I slowly worm my way down. Akira's restraint is not only shocking but commendable. Finally after what felt like an eternity I can feel my ass sitting solidly in his lap. My chest heaves with excitement as I hold onto him. “Akira you're so wonderful.” I know he can't understand everything I said, but my affection is bared. I hate that I felt a need to rush to have this physical connection. But truly I do feel this warmth in my depths. I've kept him waiting too long, I doubt his patience will hold up much longer.

 

With a groan I lift my hips, the sudden almost void feeling foreign before I slam my hips back down. Something broke from my lips. Only on reviewing the tapes did I realize it was a squeal. How mortifying. But in that moment all I could feel was how Akira filled me to the brim, pressed against all the right spots. I dug my face into his neck, kissing and nipping while I tried my best to ride him. It was hardly the best job but I could feel his heart pounding in excitement. Our bodies pressed as tightly together as I could ever hope them to be.

 

Based on the tapes alone I did a half ass job. Yet despite that hearing Akira's moans while I did it. I'm ashamed to confess that like some school boy who had never fucked before I came again before giving Akira even one. Oh how I called his name, head thrown back as I clenched down on his molten thickness. It was in the next moment that things derailed from my plans. The first sign was the sensation of warm hands squeezing my ass.

 

In the next moment Akira has flipped me onto my back, a gasp breaking from me in confusion. Then like a jackhammer his hips are firing forward and back. Those strong hands encircling my waist. In this moment of absolute over stimulation I muster up enough strength to pull his collared neck to mine. Lips locking in a rough display as I feel repeated bottoming out. My ass is sore at this point, but I didn't care. I was having fun, I was being held. Simultaneously being venerated and violated by the only thing I have possibly felt love for.

 

I groan into his mouth. Feeling his sex swell and twitch violently in time to those brutal thrusts. And through it all I don't hate it. No I adore it. Anything Akira will give me I realize that I will take. His rhythm is rough, unconcerned with being lovely to behold. But it is lovely to experience.

 

I break again when he throws back his own head, both our bodies arching in mutual pleasure. He marks my insides with warm ropes of his seed, while I experience a painful dry orgasm. Left and Right hands digging rivulets in his back as my legs wrap about his waist. I'm gasping and trying to stay awake, he has no intent on withdrawing prematurely nor do I wish for him to. It gets harder to keep my eye's open and I clutch him closer whispering his name. I can't seem to muster the energy for anything else. Then it is a quiet darkness.

 

When I came to I was swaddled in a blanket. My private areas still sore from Akira's abrupt affectionate display. It's dark and I realize he's brought me into his nest. I passed out again in his arms shortly after.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you enjoyed it please let me know. Additionally no chapter tomorrow.


	17. Interlude: "Black Bird"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First up for today is an interlude dream. Remember these are important.

**???**

 

I'm uncertain where I am.

Once again I'm covered in wings with many feathers of brilliant white.

But the place where I am is a place that never was.

It is like a vacuum, a void of nothing.

But in this place between existence and the divine.

Somewhere something is calling me.

 

Like a moth to the flame I cannot resist.

After all I am all out of tears to cry.

And in the distance there is something.

It moves slowly, moving bout this great sea of nothing.

Fishing up small blackened fragments from it.

Like that I hear a wail cry out.

 

My heart shudders and fails.

The tears I thought I was out of are springing forth.

This sound is my water witch.

Bringing forth feelings I was sure had died.

Great wings flare out as I surge forward.

A small broken figure knelt on the ground crying.

 

As it looked up I knew that person.

I always know them, I always want them.

But they were gone for so long.

He blinks as he spots me.

Long eyelashes flickering those amber eyes in and out of existence.

Then I see the trees for the forest.

 

He is broken.

Still covered in cracks.

The things he fishes up from the nothing are not simply things.

No they are pieces of himself.

A soul sundered.

Something that by all accounts could not be done.

He inserts that piece he found, and his eye's light up with recognition.

“Lucifer. I... I can't remember”

At first that voice filled with elation and then despair.

He has become fragmented.

Only the greatest pieces of his attributes remain, but he is still Akira.

 

This time unlike countless cycles I can comfort him.

So I clutch his broken cracked body tightly to myself.

I will not leave him in this place of nothing between existence.

This unfair hellscape that will only bring him pain.

I've watched humanity live and die countless times in the absence of Akira.

 

Even like this with his body ruined I need him.

But if I am to keep him I must let him go for a bit.

Only upon the mortal plain can I hope for his soul to recover.

For of all HIS creations only humanity seems to heal wounds of the soul.

I wrap my wings about him as I lift his body up from this place.

Clutching him to my bosom as I whisper.

“That is fine, we can make new ones.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading. I plan to put a second proper chapter up today.


	18. Jenny the Magnificent

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here's the promised chaper. Fresh n ready.

****Subject** ** ****Akira & Miko** **

****Diary of Ryo** **

****Date 06/01/2xx3** **

 

I woke up from yesterday and proceeded to mark everything down retroactively. Still feeling rather sore and Akira is sticking to me like glue... it's nice. I think I like this most of all. More than even my fancy designer clothing. I also keep having strange dreams, I can never seem to recall them fully. Lately they've been making me happy. Jenny should be coming back in the next few hours with Miko.

 

For now I'll just enjoy Akira's company... maybe take him into the shower for a bit more intimacy and cleaning.

 

Akira is definitely acting even more assured of himself. While we were in the shower we went at it twice. I'm not even sure where or how he found my lube bottle. I'm not complaining though. While being in control is nice there's something about him making me obey that does... things to me.

 

Unfortunately now I'm having difficulty walking so I'm carrying a spray bottle to spritz him when he gets fresh with me. I've had to use it three times so far.

 

It's been about half an hour since the last entry and Akira seems to be back to behaving perfectly. With only a slight oddity. Said oddity being that he's insisting on laying his head in my lap. It's a bit disruptive to my ability to write. But still less than him trying to go doggy style. Something that I can confirm with him is... very special.

 

I just made the mistake to look at him in my lap. We made eye contact for a painfully long time before he pulled me into a bruising kiss. This is going to get harder and harder to explain to Jenny.

 

Jenny's knock just resounding. Hopefully this will let me peel Akira a bit from me. Not that he is especially eager to let me out of his hugging radius.

 

Well fuck me. I opened the door and of course. It's not Jenny. Oh no no it's much worse. It's Michael.

 

I demand from him immediately to state his business or to go die. He merely chuckled at me and held his hands up like that would somehow placate me before speaking. “Ryo buddy please. I'm trying I really am. I know I fucked up. But your father, was a terrifying man. Frankly if I hadn't told him I feared if he found out what he might do.” My disdainful glare must have been obvious even to this idiot because he quickly continued on realizing I was liable to slam the door any moment now. Bless these well made hinges. “Look all I'm trying to say is I fucked up. Big time and it's not okay. So if you ever need anything. Just tell me. Not asking for forgiveness. I'm just... y'know sorry.” That last bit almost sounded genuine with his flushed face and inability to look me in the eyes.

 

I debated telling him to stick his genitalia in the doorway so I could slam it on it. But decided instead to just say “I'll keep it in mind.”. It can never hurt to have people you can call in favors from. Besides outside Jenny I don't really have anyone that could be called friends. I mean I guess Akira and Miko are, but they have no rights. Effectively the world doesn't see them as humans but tools and abominations.

 

He left after that without incident so now I'm laying across Akira's lap. Surprisingly he seems to know how to be soothing and is stroking my hair. Maybe I should train him to give massages. After all he's got the strength he should be able to do it easily.

 

Two more hours passed before I heard Jenny's knock again. So help me if it's Michael again I'll kick him square in the groin. It's Jenny, and I'm relieved, and Miko is with her looking very primp and proper. Jenny even got her dressed up in one of her suits. I'm shockingly impressed by this. She's brought a box. Oh god no. It's cake but not simply any cake. She's had a carefully crafted effigy of myself getting spanked by Akira on it. I knew she was an amazing cook but this is mortifying.

 

Akira is just staring at it in fascination while Miko seems to have picked up Jenny's trademark grin. I try and sputter a defense that no such thing happened but she's having none of it. She just whispers in my ear “That's okay. You two go together naturally.” in a way that leaves no room for argument. Miko is poking Akira's side and he's blushing.

 

Fuck there's no way I'm fooling anyone here. Damn you Akira your poker face is worse than any I've ever seen.

 

Jenny teased me about it for a good bit before serving up slices of cake. Apparently she managed to teach Miko to eat with a fork. I'm starting to feel inadequate compared to her. Akira definitely likes it because he ends up consuming half of the cake with his bare hands. I find myself wanting to crawl into a hole for being in love with such a savage.

 

Jenny only laughed and enjoyed it. When she decided it was time to leave she pulled me along. Whispering things softly. “If you decide you want to free them. Simply tell me. All of the subjects did not die. I simply failed to get them all out.” Suddenly things are starting to make sense. I can't help but see Jenny in a new light. How did she manage that without getting caught. She see's me staring and only winks in response.

 

I'm shocked. It makes sense. But I can't help but be amazed at the sheer brazen courage of her. She is single handedly responsible for the third generation subjects being nearly nonexistent. I find myself troubled though, I want to let them go free into the world. The idea is thrilling, seeing Akira in public getting to dress up and go on dates.

 

But what if he doesn't want me then? What if I am never able to see Miko again? After all my identity is inextricably attached to this facility.

 

Akira caught me crying and brought Miko over. They dragged me off to bed. Miko seems intrigued watching Akira try and kiss me into smiling.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everything is not always as it seems. Implications implications.


	19. Flip a coin and lose.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a bit more of a cerebral in Ryo head chapter. It also sets it up for the end.

****Subject** ** ****Akira & Miko** **

****Diary of Ryo** **

****Date 06/02/2xx3** **

 

Waking up was hard today. I have some faint recollection of Akira and myself frolicking on the beach. Which is weird because I don't even like the beach. Weirdly enough I'm pretty sure I was even wearing a woman's swim suit. Granted I've never been very masculine. Perhaps my increased exposure to Akira is making me subconsciously desire a more traditionally submissive role/partnership.

 

So far I'm treating that as an unlikely reason. On another note Miko has taken to wearing clothing literally all the time now. I really do not understand how Jenny managed to make that happen...

 

On the subject of Jenny, what she said yesterday has been bothering me. I plan to talk to her more about it today. The idea that one women is responsible for the systemic ex-filtration of over a hundred subjects is... Insane is a word that comes to mind. But at the same time when I took some time to look over the death records. They were happening at a steady interval and in batches of 5. If this is true though where would she have taken them? Is it viable for her to get Akira and Miko out? Do I even want that?

 

Obviously I want to see them free but what if it comes with the price of me never seeing them? I... this may be selfish of me but I can't give up Akira in that way. I'm already far too acclimated to his company and affection.

 

On the subject of Akira of late when he looks at me I almost feel like I can hear someones deep voice speaking to me.

 

And the phone is ringing. It's Jenny.

 

We spent an hour talking on a special line. She as able to provide evidence of her claims truth. In addition she certified her involvement with this project was from the very start and has been working to end it after the success of her plan. What she did not make so clear was her plan, only cryptically uttering that I should know it very well. She's indicated if I want to free them she can make it a package deal. Freeing me from the specter of my Fathers company. It sounded like a vague promise of fire razing this company off the face of the earth.

 

Truthfully it's a lot to think about. But even if I did accept where would we go? What would we do? Akira and Miko are still unable to speak full sentences, so what meaningful future can they truly have?

 

Akira seems to have woken from a nap in the sun. Lately they've been dragging blankets out to the grass. The room is also positively infested with lizards. Thankfully this is alright since they at least keep the insects under control. He's now insisting on sitting in my lap. It's a bit uncomfortable given how much larger he is.

 

I want to free him so badly, but what if he doesn't choose to stay with me? If he left me I think I'd want to destroy everything.

 

I need to lay down. Akira looks mopey and confused at my downcast behavior.

 

I've made myself into a blanket burrito, Akira is audibly whining and trying to get in. It would be amusing if it wasn't so pathetic. The boy has claws sharper than any knife I've ever owned. Shredding this blanket like the numerous designer clothes of mine he has ruined would be child's play.

 

Oi! Stop that Akira! Fuck fuck fuck!

 

Oh god why Akira. Why did you body slam me onto the bed. I tried to lecture Akira.

 

It ended about as well as I could predict. Him lavishing me in kisses and doing things to me... I'm not sure if either of us learned anything from this. It's nice feeling his skin again against mine.

 

Oh god... Miko was... she was watching. She heard everything. I feel like my face is on fire. She looks positively amused as one can possibly be and is poking Akira in the stomach. I think I'll hang my head in shame for a bit...

 

I took a moment to peak at Akira and Miko's interactions. Rather than being bashful the bastard is acting proud. Preening like a peacock. I'm no peahen for fucks sake. I'm the peacock. He doesn't even wear pants!

 

Idea for horror movie, “ **Akira: ruiner of pants** ”. It might sound cheesy but he's ruined many of my own either by overstimulating me or literally tearing them.

 

I'm starting to think he's some sort of empath. Every time I try and separate myself due to dark moods there's Akira. Like some sort of positive magnet to my negativity. Still being the little spoon is nice. Calming.... what I wouldn't give for a small harem with nothing but Akira's.

 

I suppose I'm just running from the real problem though. What do I tell Jenny? Do I tell her that freedom is overrated so long as I get nailed by Akira? But I also know that even for me that's incredibly selfish. Fuck it I'll flip a coin, heads I set them free. Tails I keep Akira as my cabana boy.

 

Heads... best two out of three.

 

Heads... best 3 out of five.

 

This literally shouldn't be possible but I have flipped this coin five times without a single tails. I guess I'll talk to Jenny and we can make plans. I suppose all things must come to an end. I'm finding myself rather emotional and unhappy about everything. Why couldn't I have met you out there. Where you could choose me in the first place and then never have this struggle.

 

I went ahead and pushed Akira into bed and I'm insisting on being the big spoon. This is also nice. I'm actually shocked he isn't trying to fight it. I can just close my eye's and press myself up against him and feel whole.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed it. This one was a bit harder to write for some reason.


	20. Ring of Fire

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the slight delay of this chapter. I got majorly sidetracked with "I see you". The concept just hit me strong. In addition you may notice now that this fic is part of a collection. It's a collection of related to this timeline works of mine.

****Subject** ** ****Akira & Miko** **

****Diary of Ryo** **

****Date 06/04/2xx3** **

 

I've spent the better part of two days cooped up and mulling things over. Specifically the things Jenny said and offered. I've come to the conclusion that I have been too averse to taking risks for the things I want.

 

I want this, and I want him. So I've talked to Akira about it. Not that he says any words back but his affection is heart warming. Miko seems to understand significantly more, the occasional bob of her head signifying understanding.

 

Part of me wonders if Akira is an idiot.

 

I've been immediately fiercely squashing such thoughts. He simply lacks stimulus and experience and out there that is something he can have. That I can have with him. He's been sticking to me like glue the last two days. I think he's noticed how stressed I am, and as a byproduct it's made him stressed his tail has been non stop wagging like a cat.

 

I'm going to go ahead and call Jenny. Worst case scenario I end up dead. Akira and Miko are far too precious to kill, so I know they are safe.

 

The phone call was enlightening. Jenny opened up by saying she knew I would call. I tried to say otherwise but she just sat on the phone silent. As if to say “I'm so certain I don't need to bother humoring your resistance.” I finally conceded that she was right, that I did want to set them free... and that I wanted the package deal that makes me disappear too.

 

She's made a list of things we'll need for it, as well as notes of who to get them from that can be trusted.

 

The list of names is exceedingly short... specifically it's one name. Michael.

 

Choosing between freedom and prison has never been a harder choice in my life.

 

But it's not just about me now. I suppose I never really had a choice since Akira entered my life. He's become like my Sun, and like the Moon without him I don't shine. It's troubling since till I met him I never had doubts of my own worth. I knew my place and I knew my righteousness.

 

A singular individual that I chose to take on as a subject has upset my very world. Considering a world without him is unthinkable, but morbidly I can't not imagine if I had declined them. Would they have been ripped to shreds? Killed? And what of if I tried to walk away now. Or if this fails?

 

No there's no room for failure. There's no room for seeking the ingredients that Jenny has listed from anyone else. I'll be calling him shortly and inquiring about the following.

 

  1. Thermite 2 kg.

  2. Pure Ethanol 40 kg

  3. Appropriate containers that will be overlooked, must be airtight.

  4. Remote ignition devices.




 

The intent is fairly clear, the goal is firebombing the facility. It's a clever way especially with the remote ignitions allowing the planting of them ahead of time. The question is how would Michael react?

 

I'm going to go ahead and call.

 

I hung up. God I hate Michael.

 

I'm trying again, this time I won't hang up. Do it for him. Do it for him.

 

That was an interesting conversation. Michael spent the first minute laughing at me calling back after having hung up. Apparently Jenny has already spoken to him but she needs me to be the point of contact. I inquired about the required materials. He's indicated obtaining them in his position won't be hard. He has access to restricted inventory that is off the record entirely. The joys of an organization that regularly flouts the law and human rights. Thankfully he's agreed to supply the listed items covertly. It will have to be done over a period of days just due to the large quantity.

 

He also reiterated that he wasn't just doing this because he was sorry. But that he also had come to view the experimentation methods of this company as barbaric. It's a strange feeling to agree with Michael on something. Perhaps we have more in common that I truly want to recognize.

 

From what Jenny was telling me the intent is to destroy every record possible using these firebombs. It doubles as a ruse in which to get Akira and Miko out. I'm still curious how she got the others out and why we can't use that. Presumably there's a good reason.

 

Michael's first delivery will be tomorrow. So for now I'm using Akira as my pillow.

 

Akira had other ideas and now I'm awkwardly straddling him while Miko watches. I'm also fairly sure that pressure on my ass is an erection. I've tried wiggling free but his grip is something special, and not just because it feels nice when he touches my ass.

 

Miko is apparently also amused by the noises I make because she took the time to sneak up behind me and push me till I was parallel to Akira's chest. I feel like the worlds least stable human sandwich with the beefiest bread ever.

 

Managed to slink out from between them without getting plowed. I'm simultaneously relieved and intensely pissed. It feels a bit like Miko cock blocked me. It still astounds me the influence Jenny has had on her. She's been wearing different outfits every single day. I'm not even sure where the hell she's been getting them from.

 

New theory, Jenny is the clothing witch.

 

Miko and Akira realized shockingly quick that I had slunk out. They are taking me out to the sunny spot and dragging the bed. I'm a bit scareroused...

 

Getting eaten out by my anomaly riddled boyfriend, while what is practically his sister is sunning right next to me, may just be the oddest thing I have engaged in. I say this as someone that has literally done drugs off of far too many dicks in my past.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the chapter. If you did feel free to let me know. If you didn't then uh... iunno my policy is "If for any reason you're not completely satisfied, I hate you."


	21. Explosive fillings.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the brief absence of updates on Beta. Also the chapter title is my taste. It just tickles me.

****Subject** ** ****Akira & Miko** **

****Diary of Ryo** **

****Date 06/010/2xx3** **

 

It's been several days now. I've been enjoying the time spent just basking in Akiras attention. Also playing catch. Akira and Miko both seem thrilled by it. Less thrilling is them catching it with their mouths and bringing the drool covered ball to me.

 

I hadn't heard from Michael till this morning. He sent a coded message “I've sent you the requested equine dildos.” Fuck you Michael...

 

I'm really glad Akira and Miko don't know what that word means or why I sputtered and turned many shades of red.

 

The package has arrived... oh god damnit fuck you Michael. Fuck you with this god damn horse dick you sent me!

 

Seriously what kind of sociopath literally ships you a dildo to disguise the materials for a fire bomb?

 

Though it was a bit amusing seeing how Akira suddenly got all grabby with me when I opened it. Like he knew what that object is made to do. Cute.

 

So at present I have several crates of ethanol in the designated containers. And a single container with iron oxide, aluminum and plaster of paris. All in super fine powders. I think Michael ground them himself. A good call since buying these outright would probably raise so many alarms.

 

Roughly 428 grams of Iron oxide, 286 grams of both Aluminum and plaster. I've gone ahead and carefully mixed them in a bowl while I get the molds prepared. It's proving difficult to keep Akira and Miki away from things.

 

I've successfully poured the mixed thermite into the molds Michael provided. It's made a shockingly large amount of plugs. But it makes sense for a facility of this size. So with this done they need to be allowed to cure. And unfortunately this was an aspect I didn't consider. I lack access to a dehydrator or an oven. And sticking what is essentially metal blocks in a microwave is a horrible idea.

 

A minor setback that will also give me more time to prepare. I've gone ahead and had Akira move the crates of heavy Ethanol. I won't lie I really liked how his arms look when he's holding heavy things. The thought of “And I get to have that inside me.” is one that often crosses my mind.

 

Akira demanded my attention immediately after moving the crate. It's a bit awkward having him sitting in my lap, legs wrapped around my waist. Part of me just keeps thinking “He's yours you can just go ahead and fuck him, he'll make it known if he doesn't want it.” Oh god damnit Akira please don't test me like this... I think he's still feeling insecure because he's been kissing my neck for several minutes now.

 

I'm pretty sure I bloom just for him at this point. I've literally never wanted someone like this in my life. I mean for fucks sake I'm preparing to commit arson. I'm pretty sure we're about to end up escalating again, Miko has that look like she wants a snack for a show. Damn.

 

Well... that was unexpected. My hearts still beating rather hard so I may miss details... but what does it matter when this record is only for my benefit now? Akira didn't just want to be on top, rather he was very insistent on rocking against my lap, forcing me to groan. I'm not sure I ever really expected to be balls deep in my beefcake of a boyfriend...

 

Now though I'm not sure I can live without it after seeing his face lit up in a flush. Those soft needy noises, it's a choir made for just me every time I hit his special spot. I don't even mind the scratches he keeps leaving all over me. Though I suppose I've always been a crazy bitch, but him? I think for him I just might be a psychopath...

 

On further examining my behavior throughout life I'm actually considering that I might very well actually be one. Disconcerting to suddenly begin looking at a pattern of aloof egotistical behavior that largely didn't care about others.

 

And there's Akira again holding me, grounding me. Bringing me back from the more dangerous line of thinking and questioning of self. Maybe he only does it out of selfishness, but I have a hard time believing that after seeing his behavior in general.

 

I fell asleep napping in his arms, but just before I passed out I noticed something new. Black leathery wings. Akira has wings, how fascinating. When I woke up They were wrapped around us tightly. I wonder what other secrets his body is hiding... will I get to find out more about him when we leave this place?

 

I want to know him more. I hope he wants to know me more. Sometimes I catch Miko looking to the east. I wonder what she's looking for. She shouldn't have any idea what's that way but like a compass points north she always seems to look that way. Sometimes she looks so forlorn, I probably looked similar for a long time.

 

I surprised her with a hug from behind. She leaned into it, just like Akira she's so warm. So incredibly strong and yet chained up away by humans... When we get out of here we'll go east to find what she's looking for.

 

Akira seems to detest being left out of hugs because the second he realized what was going on it became a hug sandwich. It's not unpleasant even if it's overly tight.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter, brought to you by dildo jokes!


	22. Interlude: "Aloha"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I've been a wee bit absorbed in Nier Automata. But I finally got the True ending so I'll try and get back to writing :).

????

 

Akira, how long were you in the dark alone? Even now as I carry what remains of you I can see fragments slipping away. As if every bond that made you exist is caving in.

 

A suspension bridge that the center cable has given up, and now it travels along. But I won't let this be. I won't let you disappear even if you say you can't remember me. I am Lucifer, and you are mine.

 

So I clutch you tight as we return from the void between. I hear the whispers of shock and surprise. My brethren horrified that the one who invited an old one back into creation somehow still exists. While my precious demonic children marvel at the hollowed out hallow shell of Amon. For they will never see the man whose soul rode through the suffering.

 

Yet even they can smell the impending death, and a strange silence rises. They are not given to many emotions but even they seem to feel something akin to sorrow at the idea Amon the champion will pass.

 

And so I take Akira down the halls, his shattered form heaving to breathe out of habit. I can feel the way he tries to weakly shift. To protest that he can walk on his own. I would sooner see Father return, than allow that in his state. So I hush him, voice high and affection as I lean down. This is my pillow talk, reserved only for him.

 

“Akira, just hold to me tightly. I will fill that hole in your soul.” For the first time in what feels like eternity he doesn't fight me. He just feebly holds to my skin.

 

“You feel so warm... it's nice.” That voice I craved to hear, I miss no word of it despite the weakness tainting it. It is in this moment I wish I could keep him like this.

 

An Akira weak and vulnerable who can do nothing but depend upon me. It is also not an option, even as I walk to the pools of creation I feel him slipping away. The water slowly parting for me till I am waist deep. Surely he feels the warm waters of creation lapping at his back. If he does that he gives little indication.

 

“Akira, we must part here for now.” The words sting like poison in my throat as I say them. While it will cosmically be a blink of the eyes even that hurts. How many times did I watch humanity begin and die while he was gone?

 

Those amber eyes flutter open a moment. They look suddenly so lucid as Akira smiles at me. Right arm raising to caress my jaw and cheeks. I'm crying just feeling this, the thing I want most so close.

 

“I'll see you again, right?” Akira sounds almost as worried and sad as I feel. I can feel my chest quiver and once again he's made me cry ugly tears. Unlike the other times he's able to feel them when I lean down to claim his lips. Kisses aren't supposed to taste like the ocean.

 

So I speak softly to him as I withdraw my arms to let his being sink into creation. “I will always know and want you. I will not share you. You are mine Akira.”

 

Just like that I watch as he sinks into the depths. I feel like my heart has been ripped from me, to lay with him. To the places even angels must not tread, but it will make him whole and once more he will ride Amon's flesh.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A thanks to Harloq the whiny beta.


	23. End call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey sorry about the super super long wait. But this is the final chapter for Subject Beta, only a singular interlude will remain to be written after it. 
> 
> Once more thanks to my wonderful beta Harloq.

****Subject Akira & Miko** **

****Diary of Ryo** **

****Date 07/01/2xx3** **

 

It's been nothing but setbacks lately. First the thermite took absurdly long to cure. Now there is a security alert on the facility. I fear they have found one of the firebombs. This is less than ideal.

 

There doesn't seem to be any choice but to attempt to go early in a highly chaotic unplanned manner. I've contacted Jenny, she's already on her way. The plan was originally for us to all go together during the evacuation as cover. Now security is on high alert and I fear large groups will be subject to more scrutiny.

 

Towards that end we will be splitting up. Jenny will be taking ~~subject Gamma~~ Miko out via the loading docks. She has connections there and won't be questioned per her comments.

 

If it's not obvious enough this will be my final entry... Normally nothing seems to really get to me, but my hands are shaking a bit as I write this. I'm not sure what will happen. Akira seems to be aware of my stress and is sticking close to me.

 

Jenny has finally arrived and sent the coded message letting me know. She's gone ahead and taken Miko with her. Miko seemed rather alarmed at the suddenness of it all. I tried to smile. I think I may have made a horrible face.

 

Phone just went off, security alert just increased. I swore on impulse and Akira definitely knows something is wrong. I've gone ahead and set all the firebombs to go off in short order.

 

Fuck it's gone off again.

 

This is unexpected. Michael is helping me... albeit very round about and nothing overt. Apparently the security has all been pulled away from the morgue and associated facility.

 

This news is a boon. Unfortunately I'm also not sure how Akira will react to passing through it with all the remains of failed and ongoing subjects. If he loses himself then I suppose we will at least die together. The thought brings me a small comfort. I don't want to exist without him....

 

… if you're reading this it means I did a bad job and the files managed to survive or be recovered. This is my sin. Lust for an abomination with a purer heart than I have.

 

 

 

**Ryo's final will and testament.**

 

Things have gone even poorer than I ever thought they could. I'm almost certainly going to die here. I can't find Akira. It's hot and the air is hard to breathe.

 

Initially our egress was going perfectly. Not a single check point in between us and the morgue wing. The roaring explosions began going off as we entered the morgue.

 

This is where everything went more wrong. Akira... Akira saw the specimens preserved. I tried to stop him from wailing and shifting. I wasn't able to. He didn't mean to hurt me but his tail hit me. I'm not sure how long I was unconscious.

 

This is my fault. I was too impatient. I wanted to share the sky with him. Now I fear we will die in the belly of this collapsing facility. My breathing is getting more difficult and I'm coughing constantly as I'm sure this recording indicates. I can't say I ever thought about how much smoke burns and aggravates the eyes.

 

I can hear the steel and concrete shuddering from the heat. The structure is going to come down eventually... I'm rather hopeful that carbon monoxide will get me before that.

 

Dying seems to be rather stressful... I think if Akira was with me I could do it with some grace. As it is I'm starting to cry and sniffle. This is pathetic. I spent my life swearing that love isn't real.... then I met Akira. Now here I am just wishing to see him one last time.

 

It's almost funny.

 

But I can't seem to manage even a slight huff of amusement. The groans of the building are growing louder. I think I'm also hearing Akira roaring. I fear he may be dying but there's nothing I can do with this stone crushing my leg.

 

Fuck. It's him, it's him as his first primal anomaly. Even with this shitty lighting I can see that red. The way he stares at me. Akira... A-Akira I'm so sorry... I couldn't save you, I just wanted to free you so you could choose me.

 

He's coming closer slowly. I can see his tail whipping about.

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So reminder, I love feedback and even just comments letting me if you liked what I wrote. There will again be a singular interlude after this to come. The ending is deliberately written the way it is.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this marks the end of me writing Subject Beta. I'll be resuming writing on Satan-chan as well as I see you in the next few days hopefully. This is the final interlude and is meant to be read as occurring chronologically last but with the events that occurred to Beta and Ryo being left open ended.
> 
> Once again thank you for reading this work. Liking it, leaving comments or kudos. These things all help me to feel good, because unfortunately I'm a broken shallow bitch.
> 
> Once more thank you to my Beta reader Harloq.

???

  
  


It's lonely.

  
  


I've lost track of just how long I've been alone now.

The wounds that should have long since healed.

Did they drag _him_ under?

  
  


Heaven never used to be this cold.

Were that I had any tears left I imagine they would twinkle loudly upon the ground.

  
  


Was I not there to witness _his_ last gasps?

Bubbles of that earthly essence spiraling up through the depths.

So I sit here, upon my cold throne.

The price paid in blood, bone and a final thing I dare not name.

  
  


For names are power. They give things form.

  
  


I hear a loud clang, perhaps one of them has finally gone stir crazy.

The great doors of heaven rent open like paper.

Maybe I can alleviate this ennui upon their flesh.

  
  


He's imposing.

At least as imposing as a demon can be.

Striding through my chamber as if it was his while my retinue throws up a fuss.

This bold bastard...

How dare he act as if he could fill that hole.

  
  


I can see Jenny acting.

She's telling the retinue to leave the chamber.

Good she knows I must teach upstarts that I am still Satan.

I am still the morning star even without the sun I orbited.

  
  


My thrones arms give way as I clench it and stand.

I have nothing but hate in my heart for this one.

It's as if his form was made to stir the worst in me.

Black fur, stripes of red marks running through it and upon his flesh.

Like some sort of patchwork monstrosity.

  
  


I bellow at it.

“How dare you invade my sanctuary!”

I can hear the loud clacking of strong clawed feet even as he pointedly ignores my words.

How dare he.

  
  


That mocking form, it's as if I'm looking at Amon.

But Amon is gone.

Where he is I no longer know.

Perhaps he sired a childe.

He was always so ready to share his “seed”.

  
  


The bitter thoughts are back.

My own inability to claim _his_ heart.

It's a gaping wound that refuses to heal, and it distracts me with the pain.

Just like that he is upon me.

A roaring beast fighting for dominance with me.

Somehow it's refreshing.

To not have one who simply bows to all my whims.

  
  


I'm not sure why I do it.

But I'm holding back, I could have blown him away from the start.

There was never any need to entertain this.

But there's something familiar in this closeness.

In those mighty hands grasping my wrists above my head.

  
  


It's amusing how he bellows with rage.

He can tell I'm not even trying and feels insulted.

Just like that though his tactic changes and he collapses into me.

  
  


It's flustering how it makes my heart beat quickly.

Soft whispers in my ears as he squares himself away between my hips.

These words, these thoughts and feelings he expresses.

No more than just that... this form.

  
  


…

It's not some cruel mockery.

Things have never gone as I planned.

Yet _he's_ here.

The holes within _him_ filled.

  
  


Both changed and yet still all so the same.

These sweet soft words.

The pitter patter of my heart singing louder.

No doubt _he_ can hear it with his head pressed to my bosom.

  
  


God is dead.

But still I curse him for ever having been.

For making a damned loop.

Still it is only because he existed that this one pressing into me exists.

  
  


How pathetic to be slightly grateful at this moment when I get some semblance of what I want back.

A groan snakes past my lips.

 _His_ ministrations are the same sort of desperate I feel.

I shouldn't, but I'm hooking my legs about _him_.

I refuse to let _him_ get further from me.

Digits roaming _his_ wide back, digging little trenches along the way.

  
  


This moment is mine.

 _He_ is mine.

This sensation as _he_ marks and ruts into me.

I can't help but gasp and call for _him_.

Happy noises upon _his_ lips.

Seeing how I respond without self control to _his_ touch.

Like a parched flower I swallow all the water _he_ can give.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading <3

**Author's Note:**

> Subject Beta will receive more frequent updates than my other work. It's my destressor to dealing with more dense plot and interactions.


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